Complicated Affection
by IHaveTheKeyToYourHeart
Summary: Clare and Eli are falling in love, but there are multiple obstacles keeping them apart. Will they be able to overcome them? Rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1

** My new favorite Degrassi couple is Clare/Eli! Clare is one of my fave characters, and Eli seems like a good match for her. So this starts out during 7/29/10's episode, Better Off Alone pt. 2 right after Clare and Eli talked in front of Clare's house! And I know I changed a few things about that episode in this story. Please R&R!**

** Claire**

I rushed over to Eli, who was getting in his car and placed my hand over his on the top of the car door. I felt a spark of electricity run through me as our hands touched. Something about him was different. I don't know what it is about him, but somehow I can't get him out of my head. It's like he really knows me for me, even though we've only known each other for a week and a half. He stared down at our hands in a puzzled way. My cheeks flamed, as I suddenly began to feel uncomfortable. Did he not like me? It seemed like he was always flirting with me; was I wrong in my interpertation of his actions? Then he smiled, that brillant smile that always seemed to put me at ease.

"Thanks for the headphones." I said, holding them up.

"No problem. They're great, I have two more pairs." he said, wiggling his hand out from under mine and sitting down in the hearse and rolling down the window.

"Oh." was all I could manage to say.

"Yup. Well, I guess I'll see you in class on Monday. Well, that is unless you wanted to go out - I mean hangout tomorrow." he smiled the same ease-feeling smile again.

"Sure!" I said, a little too excitedly. "Coffee at the Dot?" I asked, playing with the cord on the oversized headphones.

He smirked. "Not really my scene. How about you come over to my place tomorrow and bring your MP3 player and I could find you some killer music to put on it."

I stared down at the headphones. I wasn't really sure I liked Eli's kind of music. But I was open to new experiences, and this was one I could not pass up.

"I'll need directions to your house." I said, looking up at him and smiling flirtaciously.

"I'll just pick you up tomorrow. 2:00 okay?" he asked.

"2:00's fine. I guess I'll see you tomorrow then." I said, walking up to the first step up to my door.

"Guess you will." he said coolly, turning up the volume on the CD he was listening to in his car, and drove away.

...

**Eli**

So, was this a date? I was a high believer in communication, but with Clare I always felt a little nervous. I know, hard to believe isn't it? I wasn't the type to blurt out sappy feelings to a girl, but Clare really had me going for her. She always left me guessing, and I had no idea where we were gonna end up. But what the hell was tomorrow? For some reason it seemed to be a little too cozy to be just two friends hanging out. And I'm surprised she agreed. I mean, Clare didn't really seem like the metal-punk-smash-your-head-into-a-wall kind of girl. I was sure she'd suggest something else, then I could call her out on it. But one thing's for sure, tomorrow is gonna be a bigger deal then just sharing music with a friend. At least, I hope.

...

**Claire**

After Eli left, I stood on the porch for a second, wondering what to do. I couldn't go back inside, I could hear the muffled voice of my parent's talking through the open kitchen window. Then I stared at the headphones in my hand, wishing I had brought my MP3 player outside with me so I could try out my new head phones. I decided there was nothing else to do then but take a walk. I stashed the headphones in the mailbox, and started walking down the sidewalk. I was going in the direction of the Dot, so I figured I might as well stop there and get a decaf tea. I walked into the Dot, and up to the bar and sat down in one of the green plush stools.

"One decaf tea." I said to Spinner.

"Coming right up." he smiled as he turned around and grabbed a coffee cup off the stack on the counter.

Then someone sat down next to me. I was currently lost in thoughts about what tomorrow would be like, so I didn't even notice them say hello to me until they tapped me on the shoulder.

"KC!" I said, a little shocked.

"Day dreaming?" he said jokingly.

"Uh, yeah. Sorry."

"No biggie. One decaf coffee." he said to Spinner.

"So, how are you?" I asked awkwardly, playing with the sleeve on my denim jacket.

"Uh, fine. How have you been?" he said, sympathetically.

I rolled my eyes. "Just fine. You weren't my entire life KC and it's time you got that into that thick skull of yours!"

He looked a little shocked. "I know that" he paused "I didn't mean it like that, I mean Clare-" he was cut off as my tea was set down in front of me.

I reached my hand into the pocket of my jeans expecting a wad of money to be there. But then I remembered I changed my pants when I got home from the Showcase that afternoon because I spilled juice on them. I drew my hand out of my pocket, embarrassingly looking up at Spinner.

"I'm sorry, I thought I had money with me but I forgot it. Is there anyway I can like, return this?" I asked, pushing my tea over to him.

Spinner stared at the tea. "Uh, I don't really know-"

KC pushed a twenty dollar bill across the counter. "I got it." he said.

I looked up at KC, he smiled as he stood up and grabbed his backpack off the floor and then grabbed his coffee cup.

"Well, uh, thank you." I said, my cheeks growing warm.

"No problem. See ya." he said as he left.

"See ya." I mumbled.

What was that? I didn't think KC had it in him to be a gentlemen! And the truth was, I really did miss him. He was my first love, and your first love is always impossible to get over. But I knew what was best for me, and that was Eli. So for right now, I had to forget about KC. I just wish that wasn't next to impossible.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the very positive reviews! :)**

** Clare**

I grabbed the headphones out of the mailbox. It was at least 10:00 at night, and I couldn't hear my parent's talking so I assumed they had finished. I was a little nervous as I opened the front door and stepped inside the front room.

"Clare?" I heard my mom call softly from upstairs.

"Yeah, I'm home." I said.

There was no reply as I climbed up the stairs and knocked softly on my parent's door. I waited a few seconds before opening the door. I gasped and burst into tears.

"Oh no." I said, covering my face with my hands and stepping inside my parent's room, dropping Eli's headphones and rushing over to the huge bed in the middle of my room and hugging my mom. My mom was a wreck, her hair was a mess and her makeup was smeared all over her face. She was sitting in the middle of the bed, with a box of Kleenex and there were used tissues scattered all over the bed.

My mom just cried hysterically into my shoulder. I awkwardly rubbed her back as I too cried. Then I looked around the room and noticed the mess. All of the suitcases and duffel bags we owned we're laying on the floor, with my Dad's clothes and belongings were spilled in a messy pile next to them. I bit my lip to stop crying.

"Clare?" my mom said, sitting up and blowing her nose with a fresh tissue.

I nodded as I too grabbed a tissue from the box.

"Dad" she choked on the word "is not going to be around much anymore."

My eyes filled with fresh tears. "Can I know why?" I asked quietly.

"I f-found out why he's b-b-been working o-overtime at work." she said, trying to keep from crying.

"Oh no." I said, staring at the white comforter on the bed and covering my face with my hands. All this time he was having an affair?

"That lying, cheating _bastard!" _my mom cried, jumping off the bed and throwing the pile into the suitcases. She was hysterically crying now as she violently threw the various things into the suitcases.

I jumped off the bed, and timidly approached my mom. I hugged her from behind, and she stopped throwing things. She turned around and wrapped her arms around me, and started sobbing into my shoulder again.

_This is going to be a very long night, _I thought, as I wiped a tear from my cheek.

...

At around midnight, after two very long hours of crying together, my mom finally said she needed to be alone. I left her room and closed the door, then I sunk to my knees and start bawling, right in front of the door. I was so confused, about everything. Nothing seemed sense, this was never supposed to happen! I regretted pushing my mom to talk to him now, even though I knew this was going to happen whether or not I asked my mom to talk to him. I knew I wasn't going to sleep at all tonight, but I changed into my comfiest pajama's, soft blue short shorts and a black cami, and went downstairs to find some comfort food. I made myself some hot chocolate and went and sat down on the couch. Then I looked over at the dull black computer moniter and went over and hit the On button. I sat down in the computer chair and an IM popped up on the screen.

_e-golds49: Didn't know you were such a nightowl, Edwards._

_clare-e25: Can't sleep._

_ e-golds49: Neither can I. so whats up?_

_ clare-e25: *sigh* nothing good._

_ e-golds49: care to explain?_

_ clare-e25: ... i'd rather explain to you in person._

_ e-golds49: well you can wait till tomorrow, but since we're both wide awake why don't i just come over?_

_ clare-e25: r u serious? it's after midnight!_

_ e-golds49: that it is._

_ clare-e25: well, i mean i guess you could come over._

_ e-golds49: thanks for the invitation!_

_ clare-e25: just get over here. but dont ring doorbell, my mom is home._

_ e-golds49: see ya in a few. _

_ e-golds49 is offline._

I shut the computer down and placed my mug in the sink and grasped the sink and leaned over it. I can't believe Eli was coming over at this hour! Was Eli a friend? I guess so, because I guess true friends do come over to your house at midnight when you're in the middle of a meltdown. I did the dishes nervously, while I cried a little bit, then I heard a soft knock on the door. I ran over to the door, composed myself a bit and then opened it quietly.

"Hi. Come in." I said as I moved out of the way.

Eli looked at me, in what seemed a sympathetic way. Eli, sympathetic? No way!

Then he gently cupped my face and wiped away the tears with his thumb. I immediately felt the sparks again, even though that sounds so cliche. He frowned.

"Your parents?" he asked softly.

I nodded slowly as I felt tears spring in my eyes. "Uh, l-let's go up to my room."

He followed my up the stairs, then we quietly walked past my mom's room and walked down the hallway to my room. I opened the door and motioned for him to come inside. He stepped inside and closed the door.

"So, do you wanna talk?" he asked. "I know what it's like. My uh, parents got divorced when I was 5."

The tears that filled my eyes spilled over without warning as I buried my face in my hands. I didn't even know Eli came over and sat down next to me on my bed until I felt is arms wrap around me and pull me into his chest.

**Eli**

I wasn't exactly the comforting type, put honestly seeing Clare in pain made my own chest ache. She cried into my chest, as I held her. Then I gently laid back on her bed, bringing her with me. Soon enough, her tears slowed.

"Ssh, it's okay." I said. Definately not words that came out of my mouth often.

She stopped crying and sat up and looked at me. I felt a little embarrassed as I too sat up. Then she reached for my hand, and intertwined his fingers with mine. She smiled a little, her face still wet with tears.

"Thanks for coming Eli. It uh, means a lot." she said, her voice still thick with tears.

I reached across to her bedside table and grabbed a tissue from the box and handed it to her. "No problem."

She blew her nose and then looked down. "Oh gosh, I'm wearing my pajamas." she said, embarrassed. She then got up and walked over to her closet, opening the door and grabbed a bathrobe from off a hook.

I had to admit it to myself, she did look good in her PJ's.

"You look fine." I said, smiling at her.

She looked at me for a few seconds, and then put the robe back on the hook and shut the door and came over and sat down next to me.

I leaned a little closer to her. "So what is this? Some kind of sad slumber party?" I whispered flirtaciously, my face just inches from hers.

"Only if you want it to be." she said, staring at the bedspread.

I put two fingers under her chin and lifted her head so she was looking at me. "Am I allowed to stay the night?"

She nodded shyly as I kicked off my shoes and tucked my feet under myself.

I decided now was a pretty good time to tell her I liked her. I grabbed her hand, feeling pretty confident as I looked into her sparkling blue eyes, that I could see perfectly even though it was rather dark in here.

"Clare" I breathed "I like you, a lot. You're like no other girl I've ever met. You're different."

"A good different or a bad different?" she asked, smiling at me.

"An excellent different." I said.

She smiled, as she pulled the sheets up and got under them and then motioned for me to lie next to her. I shyly took off my black blazer and threw it next to my shoes as I got under the covers.

"Well you're an excellent different kind of person as well." she smiled as leaned closer to me.


	3. Chapter 3

**I was absolutely BLOWN AWAY by the awesome reviews I was getting! Thank you so much, it means a lot to me. So I updated as soon as I could. Enjoy! :)**

** Eli**

Clare leaned in towards me, closing her eyes. It is hard for me to admit to myself, I've never kissed _anyone_ before. At my old school, I was bullied and ridiculed on a daily basis. I was the weirdo loser kid everyone just _had_ to shove when they walked by me. The bullying was one reason why I moved to Degrassi, and maybe one reason why I was kind of cold to Clare when I first met her. Of course, Clare was different. I expected her to be like everyone else when I first met her. The kid who she would use for the punch line of every joke. But after I had gotten to know her, my sarcasm and general meanness I used as a sheild started to gradually melt away. It was like she was changing me into a better person.

But in those few seconds where Clare's face was inches from mine. Her lips parted slightly, her eyes closed and her bangs hanging so far low that they rested on her cheek, I couldn't help feeling like she was out of my league. I had heard around school that she dated some football-basketball-hot-shot-star last year. How could I, Eli Goldsworthy, The Weirdo, compete with some dude like that?

I must have paused for too long, because Clare's eyes opened and she blushed. I knew it was now or never, so I cupped her face and kissed her.

...

**Clare**

Eli pulled back the covers on the other side of the bed and slid under them, obviously a little uncomfortable. I smiled to myself, even though if anyone knew about mine and Eli's little "sleepover" right now, I'd simply die. But I had never felt more safe and ready for whatever life was ready to chuck at me, then now. Eli turned over and faced me. I didn't pull the curtains closed, so the moonlight shone brightly into my room and I could see him perfectly.

"Well you're an excellent different kind of person as well." I whispered as I leaned in to kiss him, my heart beating a million times a minute. I thought it would leap out of my chest as I puckered my lips. I waited there for a couple seconds, waiting for him to do the rest. But he didn't move, and I could feel the heat rush into my face quickly. I opened my eyes and looked at him. He had a strange look on his face. I was _so_ embarrassed, I was just about to kick him out of my house. But then he smirked, the one he always uses after he manages to somehow annoy me or humiliate me and cupped my face and kissed me. I was shocked for a few seconds, so I froze. But then as his lips moved against mine, just asking for me to return the affection, I kissed him back, with as much passion as I could possibly muster. I could tell he was inexperienced, as his lips moved in a way that seemed a little curious. But for the moment, nothing else in the world mattered, but Eli Goldsworthy.

...

**Eli**

Clare pulled away after awhile, as we were both gasping for air. She edged herself even closer to me, if that was even possible, and snuggled into my chest. I wrapped my arms around her and leaned my head on to the top of her's. There were no words that could describe that kiss, except _amazing. _

Gee, Clare really was turning me into a mushball. And I was surprisingly more then okay with it. I reached down and kissed her forehead. She started tracing shapes into my chest with her finger.

"What does this mean?" Clare asked softly, confusion evident in her voice.

I sighed contently and she pulled herself up and rested her head on the pillow so she was looking at me in the eyes.

"That I should come over past midnight often?" I joked.

She smacked my arm and gave me that im-going-to-kill-you-if-you-aren't-serious look.

"Whatever you want it to." I said, closing my eyes.

Clare pulled the covers up around us and sighed noisely.

"Can I call you my uh, boyfriend then?" she asked.

I smirked as I opened my eyes and grabbed her hand. "If that's what you want."

We sat there in a comfortable silence for a few minutes before she sweeped some of my hair out of my eyes.

"Thank you." she said. "For coming over tonight."

I nodded and pulled her into me again. How could any moment ever have been so perfect? The depression I had felt, weighing over my like a cartoon rain cloud, suddenly seemed to vanish. Clare Edwards could do that for a guy.

"No, thank you." I mumbled as I drifted into unconsciousness.

...

**Clare**

I awoke to the annoying beeping sound of my alarm clock. I groaned and rolled over and hit it. Then I remembered last night. Well actually, early this morning to be precise. I sat up and looked over at Eli. He was wide awake, staring at me and smiling.

"Morning." I said, smiling back. I knew sleeping in a bed with a guy, (JUST sleeping, nothing more) was something I never would have thought I'd do in high school, let alone _kiss_ a guy in my bed. But what can I say? Eli makes me want to break rules.

"Are you planning on going somewhere this morning? It's rather early." he said, sitting up.

Then I glanced over at the clock. It was 6:15. _Crap! _It was Sunday! Sunday was when I woke up early to go to Church.

"Shit!" I whispered, getting up and starting to pace.

"Clare Edwards! Such language!" he said, smiling hugely.

"Eli, you uh gotta get out. Like now!" I said, walking over to the side of the bed he was laying on and grabbing his arm and tugging it.

"Oh good morning Eli. Would you like some coffee or maybe some breakfast?" he said sarcastically.

"Eli, I'm serious. My mom is gonna be up any minute! Crap! How do I sneak you out?" I asked.

Eli was putting on his shoes. "No biggie. I'll just go out the window." he said as he grabbed his blazer off the floor and opened my window up.

"Are you crazy? We're on the second story!" I said.

Then I froze as I heard footsteps coming down the hall.

"Oh no! Get in the closet!" I screeched.

He sighed and walked over to the closet and opened the door and stepped inside. I jumped back into bed and pulled the covers around myself.

"Morning sweetie." my mom said sadly, opening the door and stepping inside.

"Uh, morning mom. Are we still going to Church?" I asked.

"Well, I think I need to get to Church, but I would understand if today you didn't feel like it." she said softly.

One rule in my family that _everyone_ follows; you go to Church on Sunday. My mom doesn't care if you have the stomach flu, or if you didn't get any sleep last night. So I gasped and kicked the covers off.

"Are you serious?" I asked.

"Well, it's not you're typical Sunday." she said, blinking back tears.

"I guess I'll stay then." I said getting up and hugging her. "Do you want me to make you some breakfast before you go?"

"No no, sweetie it's quite alright. I'm not that hungry. But if you get hungry there is some cereal and some frozen waffles somewhere in the kitchen." she said, standing in the threshold.

"Okay. Thanks Mom." I said as she shut the door and I heard her footsteps retreating from my room. Eli opened the closet door.

"So, can I come out now or are you going to hide my in here forever?" he asked.

"Nope. You can come out. I imagine you have to go?" I asked.

"Nah. My mom is on a vacation and my dad is probably hungover somewhere." he said, leaning against the closet door.

"Oh." I said, uncomfortably playing with the lacey bottom part of my cami.

Eli walked over to my window and looked out. "She's just leaving. And I hear you have food." he said smiling.

I laughed. "C'mon." I reached my hand out to him. "I'll feed you."


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for the amazing reviews! I try to update once if not twice a day because of the reviews! :) Sorry, this chapter is kind of bad. It's kind of a filler, but bear with me. The next chapter is going to be amazing.**

** Clare**

"Ouch!" I cried, dropping the burning hot waffle that had just popped out of the toaster, onto a plate.

Eli laughed. "That's a first. A waffle hurting someone."

I flipped on the cold water on the kitchen sink and stuck my slightly burned fingers under it. Eli stood up from the table and came over and grabbed his waffle.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, it just stings a little." I said, turning off the water and gently drying my raw fingers.

He grabbed my wrist and looked at my fingers. "Doesn't look too bad."

"I'll be fine." I said, smiling weakly as I grabbed the box of cereal and a bowl out of the cupboard.

"Well, you got any syrup or something? I don't really like plain waffles." he said.

"Oh yeah, I think we do." I said as I opened the fridge and peered inside. "Actually, I take that back. We have whipped cream and strawberries though."

"That'll do." he said, sitting down at the table.

I took out the package of pre-cut strawberries and set them down on the table. Then, a brilliant idea popped into my head. I hid the bottle of whipped cream behind my back and stood there, smirking at him.

He stopped what he was doing and stared at me, puzzled. "Uh, where's the whipped cream?"

"Right here!" I yelled, flipping the cap off the bottle and spraying it in his face. He sat there for a few seconds, shocked. Then he wiped away the whipped cream from his eyes and I could see him smile, even through the whipped cream covered most of his face.

"Oops, I missed your waffle." I said, playfully.

"You'll pay for that Edwards!" he laughed, jumping out of his chair and knocking it over and grabbing the bottle out of my hands. He grabbed me by my shoulders in a firm grip so I couldn't move and pointed the nozzle right at me.

"Oh no, please don't! I surrender!" I said, barely able to say it because I was laughing so hard.

He looked at me for a second and then burst out laughing as he sprayed some on my nose. I then tackled him and he fell dramatically onto the floor, holding on to me so I fell with him. I was laying on top of him, in a kind of awkward position. My cheeks flushed as I got off of him and stood up. Even though Eli and I slept in the same bed last night, I still had boundaries that I wasn't going to bypass. It was still too early in this relationship for too much physical affection, and last night was the one and only time I'd let him over after dark. I mean, the cuddling and stuff that occured last night was just what I needed after hearing the news about my parents. And no matter how much I loved last night, it was a one time thing. Eli was there when I needed him, and for right now he was all that mattered to me.

I turned around and grabbed a napkin and started wiping my nose off. I could hear Eli stand back up.

"Uh, I'm gonna need a few towels." he said.

I grabbed another napkin and he reached his hand out for it.

"I got it." I said softly, as I started wiping the dairy topping from his cheek. And gee, how could I have not have noticed his gorgeous emerald green eyes before? They were practically sparkling. He smiled a little bit as I cleaned him up. I could tell he was a bit embarrassed about the awkward thing that had happened a few seconds ago; he seemed tense.

I threw away the napkins and grabbed my bowl and filled it with cereal and milk. He leaned against the sink and ate his waffle.

"So" he said "are we still hanging out later?" he asked.

"Of course. I don't break plans." I said.

...

**Eli**

For some reason, Clare seemed in way too great of a mood for just founding out about her parents divorce last night. She didn't even get into details about it with me, which made me think she was bottling it up. I was concerned, because after my parents split I was a psycho for weeks. She was acting like nothing was wrong all of a sudden.

"Of course, I don't break plans." she said.

"Well, if you need some alone time or you need to be with your mom, I understand." I said, taking the last bite of my waffle and putting it in the sink.

"No, my mom probably needs her alone time and I'm fine."

I sighed. "Clare, are you okay?"

She stopped eating and dropped her spoon in her half eaten cereal. "I'm _fine_. I just said that!" she said through clenched teeth.

"Okay, sorry. Just asking." I said, a little shocked. "It's just after my folks split I just really needed some alone time."

She put her unfinished bowl in the sink and looked at me, she looked kind of... angry.

"I don't need you telling me how I should and should not feel and what I should and should not do about it. I'll deal with this my own way Eli!" she roared.

I stepped back and grabbed my blazer off the back of the kitchen chair. "Okay, I'm sorry. I was just trying to uh, help."

This was definately not good. It was clear as freaking day that she was about to have some kind of emotional meltdown. Her eyes were already sparkling with tears. And I had no clue how to help.

"Clare, we can hangout anytime. I think right now, what's best for you is some alone time." I said as I slipped my arms through my blazer and crossed my arms, a little afraid about her reaction.

She faced the sink and then turned around, tears streaming down her face.

"Maybe I was wrong about inviting you off all people over last night." she said angrily.

"Clare," I said. "You're all mixed up."

Even though I knew she was just a complete wreck, her words cut through me like a knife. I didn't realize until now how much she really affected me and how much I really did care about her. How could one night with Clare Edwards completely change me like this?

"Get out." she said.

I held up my hands in a surrendering way. "Sure."

I wanted to run up to her and wrap my arms around her and tell her everything's going to be okay. But I knew what Clare needed right now, and however much she think she didn't, she needed to be alone and to sort things out. I walked out of the kitchen and out of her front door and got in Mortey. I sat there for a minute, just as confused about everything as she probably was. One thing's for sure though, I wasn't the same guy I was yesterday.


	5. Chapter 5

** Hey guys. Thanks for the awesome reviews, everytime I read one it really makes me so inspired to keep writing. But this will be the last update for awhile, I'm leaving to go on vacation tomorrow. I might update once more today, but there's no guarantees. But once I get back, I'll have an awesome long chapter worth waiting for!**

** Eli**

I parked the hearse in my usual parking spot in the Degrassi parking lot and stepped out and slammed the door shut. It was Monday, the day after I had stayed over at Clare's, and I was so confused about what had happened yesterday during breakfast. I didn't know what that meant, were we fighting? Were we not? All I knew was that me and Clare had to talk a lot of things out, but right now her first priority was probably her parents. So I decided to completely ignore her until she came to me to talk. I had done enough interfereing.

I walked up the front steps of the school and flung open one of the doors. I walked down the hallway where Clare's locker was, just to see if she was there. She was no where in site, and I hadn't seen her out in front of school either which made me think she wasn't going to even be here today. She probably took the day off, which was perfectly understandable.

...

**Clare **

I rolled out of bed and glanced over at my alarm clock. _8:30 _flashed in big red letters at me. Ugh! I had forgotten to set the alarm last night and I had practically missed all of first period. I sprung out of bed and threw on the first clothes I touched. Then I ran a brush through my hair, slapped a bit of makeup on and checked on my mom. She came in late from Church yesterday, and she didn't want to talk. She just went directly to her room and she hadn't come out since. I had left a plate of dinner on the little table outside her room last night, and slid a note under the door telling her it was there. But the food was still there, untouched. I then knocked lightly on the door.

"Mom? Are you awake?" I asked softly.

No reply.

"Mom? Can I come in?"

No reply.

I reached for the knob and tried opening the door but the knob wouldn't budge. She must have locked it. I started to panic as I went into my room to find a paper clip. I found one in one of my desk drawers and then flattened out the wire and went back to the door. I knocked again, but there was still no answer. I picked the lock, which took me awhile since my hands were shaky, and flung open the door.

"Mom!" I gasped as I took in the scene before me. The room was trashed, the furniture was knocked over and the floor was cluttered with everything from in the closet and in the dresser. My mom was laying, on her stomach on the bed. The room reeked, I don't think my mom left the room to ever use the restroom. Then I noticed the bottles of prescription drugs and booze sitting messily on the bedside table. I ran to the bed and flipped my mom over and started shaking her violently.

"Mom! Mom! Wake up! Wake up!" I yelled, tears streaming down my face as I shook her.

...

**Eli**

I was right, Clare never showed up. Like I said, that's understandable but I can't help feeling like I need to check on her and make sure everything's okay. But I know I practically wrote my own constitution for this situation, and Clare was supposed to come to me when she wanted to talk. And I wasn't about to break my mental constitutions.

But the street Clare lives on is convienetly one of the streets I have to go on to get home. So as I turned on to her street, I slowed down a bit. I was practically going 2 miles an hour as I got closer to to her house. I couldn't see it very well, her neighbors had super tall bushes that blocked the view of her house. When I got to be directly in front of her house, I slammed on the breaks even though I really didn't need to since I wasn't going that fast. There sat Clare, on the porch by herself, crying hysterically. I didn't care about any stupid freaking constitution anymore, Clare was in pain and I needed to help. She stood up when she saw the hearse.

I parked the car and hopped out and ran up to her. She didn't say anything, she didn't need to. She just collapsed into my arms. I wrapped my arms around her waist and sat down. She put her head on my shoulder and cried softly. I held her like that, for about a half an hour. She didn't say or do anything but cry for all that time. What was going on here?  
"Clare?" I finally said, gently pushing her back so she was looking at me in the eyes.

"C-can... you j-just... drive me to... to the hospital?" she said, trying to hold the tears back as best she could.

"Why? Are you okay?" I asked. I grabbed both of her wrists and turned them over. For some reason, I assumed she had possibly cut herself. Because after my parents split, that's one of the things I did. I guess I gotta stop thinking that Clare is going to react the same way.

She looked at me oddly as I let go of her wrists."N-no I mean I'm okay. It's just" she buried her head in her hands. "It's my mom."

I stood up slowly. "Of course I'll drive you."

She nodded slowly and stood up. She looked like she was gonna collapse at any second. I wasn't going to ask about what happened, I don't think she can handle explaining it to me. I grabbed her hand and we walked over to Morty. I opened the passenger door and sat her down. Then I ran over to the other side and got in and started the car. Clare didn't say a word the entire ride there.

**Clare**

How can one of the best and worst things that have ever happened to me be happening in the same week? Of course, the best thing was Eli. Under that brutal exterior, he was actually a really amazing guy. And I don't even know if I would have been able to get through any of this without him. And I felt terrible for what happened at breakfast yesterday, but I knew that that wasn't important to him anymore.

As for the worst thing, that is tied between two things. My parent's divorce and my mom's suicide attempt. I called 911 right after I discovered my mom wasn't waking up and barely had a pulse, and an ambulance took her to the hospital. I didn't go in the ambulance with her because I had no way of getting home afterwards. The paramedics tried to convince me that'd she be fine, but I think they only did that so I would stop having a panic attack.

I waited outside for him, barely able to keep from collapsing on the porch and just letting everything out with a flood of tears. I knew he always went by here after school, and I didn't know if I had it in me to face this without him there. He knew all the right things to say, all the right things to do whenever I needed it. It was almost comical how we had only been _together_ for a day and a half. But does any of that really matter? Not to me at least.

And sure enough, at 3:45 on the dot, I could hear the rumbling of the motor of his hearse turn on to my street. I sat up, and tried to stop the flood of tears but they wouldn't coporate. My knight in a shiny hearse was coming to save me.

He stopped the car and hopped out. For once all day, I felt like I wasn't going to crumble.

...

We arrived at hospital, he pulled into a parking spot and turned off the car. He opened his door a bit, and then stopped. I opened my door and got out, even though I wasn't sure I was mentally or emotionally ready for this and I didn't trust my legs as they felt like jelly more then flesh and bone. It was time to be brave.

Eli then got out and came over and grabbed my hand.

"We're going uh in right?" he asked.

I nodded as I started walking up to the door.

"Are you sure you want me to come with?" he asked.

"Of course." I said.

The automatic doors opened and then my legs really felt like they were going to hit me as the hospital smell hit my nose. Eli put his arm around my waist now, to steady me. We walked up to the front desk. A small hispanic women was sitting there. She smiled at me.

"Can I help you miss?"

"I'm looking for Christey Edwards." I said, my voice shaky.

She opened up a folder and shuffled through some papers. "Room 326. On the third floor."

"Thank you." Eli said for me.

We walked over to the elevator and Eli pressed the up arrow. The elevator opened and we stepped inside. He hit the 3 button and the doors closed. He was staring at me, blankly.

"Clare?" he asked.

"Suicide attempt." I said, surprised at myself that I could get those words out. I wasn't even sure if he was going to ask about that, but he just needed to know.

He nodded once and then dropped his hand around my waist and grabbed my hand again. Tears welled in my eyes and spilled over. I was starting to get tired of them.

He just gripped my hand tighter. The doors opened and we stepped out onto the floor. Then I heard a loud commotion coming from down the hall. Me and Eli both jumped. A mob of doctors in scrubs and surgical masks were running down the hall with a hospital bed. I could hear the loud beeping of a pulse moniter. Then as they came closer into view I realized who was on the hospital bed.

"We need to get her into surgery NOW! C'mon move it move it!" I heard one of the doctors yell.

"Oh no." I whispered horrified as I began to feel lightheaded. And then everything went black.


	6. Chapter 6

** I'm back! Here's the chapter that's a bit late. Sorry, like I said I was on vacation.**

** Eli**

"Oh no." Clare whispered. She was beginning to get pale. Then she collapsed and fell onto the cold tile floor of the hospital.

"I need a doctor over here!" I yelled as I fell to my knees and grabbed her hands.

"What happened?" a voice said above me.

"I don't know she just blacked out!" I said, snapping my head up to see who was talking to me. She was a nurse.

"I'll go get a stretcher." the nurse hurried down the hospital hallway and went into a room and came back a minute later with a stretcher and a doctor.

They lifted Clare up onto the stretcher and the nurse wheeled her down the hallway.

"She's gonna be okay right?" I asked the doctor.

"She should be. She was just standing here and collapsed? What are you kids doing here anyways?" the doctor asked.

"Her mom is here. She saw her mom being rushed into surgery and next thing I know she's unconscious." I said.

"So it was a shock induced blackout. Then she should be just fine. We'll get an IV in her for a few hours and she'll be realeased sometime tonight."

"Is her mom gonna be okay? Her mom's last name is Edwards."

The doctor flipped through some papers on his clipboard. "Honestly, I really don't know, son. The drugs she used to try to kill herself are in her bloodstream now and we can't do anything to fix that."

It felt like someone punched me in the chest. I didn't know if Clare had it in her to get past this too. She wasn't strong enough to lose her mom. And I knew it would be absolute _hell _for her to have to live with her dad.

The doctor stared at me for a second and then patted me on the back and walked down the hall.

...

**Clare**

___The large Church doors swung open which created enough breeze to blow my veil back. Alli, who was carrying the train of my dress handed it to one of the other bridesmaids and then ran in front of me to fix me veil. Urgh! That just about ruined the grace of my big entrance. But none of that mattered anymore when I saw Eli, standing by the alter in a black tuxedo. He was smiling, the ease-feeling smile that had calmed me for years. I took a big breath and started walking down the aisle. Everyone was staring at me, one of my aunt's was crying and my little cousins were nosiely fighting over one of the flowers the flower girl had dropped just seconds before hand. I stumbled a bit, and my dad's arm, linked through mine, tightened a bit to keep me steady. It seemed like only a millisecond from the time I walked in until I got to the end of the aisle. My dad gently rose my veil and dropped it so he could kiss me on the cheek, then he went and sat down next to my mom in the front row and put his arm around her. My mom smiled happily at me and then nodded at me. I turned towards Eli, who grabbed my hands. _

_ "You look absolutely beautiful." he breathed, only loud enough for me to hear._

_ I blushed as the ceremony began. And all too soon it ended._

_ "You may kiss the bride." the minister said._

...

I slowly opened my eyes, it took practically all my energy to do so. My vision was fuzzy, but I could see Eli sitting in a chair next to the bed I was in.

"Where... am... I?" I said, barely able to get the words out.

"You blacked out. You're gonna be just fine."

I looked down at my hand. I felt dissappointed when there was no huge diamond ring on my finger, like the one from my dream. Then the realization of why I was in the hospital anyway hit me.

"Where's my mom? I have to see my mom!" I said, trying to pull the IV out of my arm.

Eli grabbed my hands and gently pinned them down next to my head. "Stop that."

I tried fighting his tight grasp but I knew I wouldn't be able to win. "Where's my mom!"

"She's still in surgery." Eli said, letting go of my arms and sitting back down.

"Is she going to be okay?" I asked.

"They don't know." Eli said sympathetically.

Tears rushed into my eyes and spilled over. I was starting to get sick of crying.

"No no no no no." I kept chanting.

Eli cupped my face. "Clare, I know you're scared. But you have to be strong, for your mom."

He pulled me into his arms but I couldn't hug him back because of the IV. I cried into his chest as he rubbed my back.

"She has to be okay. God wouldn't do this to me. He won't let her go." I said through the tears.

Eli didn't say anything. He kissed the top of my head.

"I won't let her go. I won't. She's a fighter, I know she didn't want this she was just depressed. She's a fighter." I said.

...

**Eli**

I held Clare all night, as she said a bunch of crazy things. She was definately out of her mind, but could I blame her? At around midnight she was released, she was so in shock she didn't even notice them take the IV out. Then we left the hospital room. I wasn't sure if she wanted to stay or go home.

She sat down in one of the chairs in the lobby so I guess she wanted to stay. I wasn't going to leave her alone so I sat down next to her. She sat as stiff as a statue and stared at the wall. I didn't bother her for well over an hour. But I couldn't fight my exhaustion anymore and slowly drifted off to sleep.

...

**Clare**

Eli fell asleep. I didn't take my eyes off the wall but I could hear him snoring softly. I was terrified, of everything. And before I was even mentally ready for it, a doctor came and stood in front of me.

"Clare Edwards? Hi sweetie, I'm Doctor Litpon."

"Hi." I said, still staring at the wall.

"Well sweetie" he moved himself in front of my view of the wall "I'm afraid I have some bad news."

I froze. I wish Eli was still awake, so he could hold me and tell me it was okay even though it wasn't.

"Your mom took about 5 different prescription drugs. We couldn't get it out of her system in time and it posioned her." he said softly.

I sat there silently.

"She didn't make it, but I know she went... peacefully. And without any pain." the doctor said calmly.

I sat there in silence for a few minutes, my mind racing with thousands of different thoughts. I wanted my mind to shut up. The doctor sat next to me still.

"NO!" I finally roared, yelling at my mind to shut up.

The doctor jumped and Eli woke up with a startle. He grabbed me by my shoulders and then looked at the doctor, who nodded at his unspoken question that was obvious enough for him to tell what it was.

"NO! NO! NO!" I kept yelling, kicking Eli to let me go. He finally stopped trying and I ran as fast as I could away from them and towards the door. I needed to get out of here or I was going to lose whatever sanity I had left.


	7. Chapter 7

**Keep reviewing! Reviews are what inspire me to keep writing. Thanks! :)**

** Clare**

I ran out of the automatic hospital doors. I didn't know where I was going, but I needed to get far away from here. I stopped for a second to decide which direction to go, and decided to speed off in the direction of the woods on the right side of the hospital. My pulse was pounding in my ears, and my breath was coming in short gaspy breaths and I immediately felt weak. I fell onto the leafy brush on the ground and laid there for minutes, trying to breathe. Then I heard the soft footsteps of someone approaching.

"Clare?" the voice I knew so well said softly.

I didn't move, I just stared up into his emerald eyes, and right now that was all I needed to stay sane. He bent down next to me and grabbed my left hand.

"Can you hear me?" he asked.

I nodded once, as my breathing started to return to normal.

He laid down next to me, and pulled me into his arms. I didn't want to cry right now. I just wanted to lay here.

But finally, the pain that was hitting my chest like bullets quickly took over my emotions, and I started crying. The tears poured out of me before I could even control them. Then I heard a the loud boom of thunder, and then came the pouring rain. It was like the sky was crying with me.

Eli slowly rocked us back and forth as he rubbed my back. We were getting absolutely soaked. My breathing became gaspy again, as I began to hyperventilate.

He pulled me up and cupped my face. "Clare you need to breathe."

I concentrated on my breathing. After several minutes, I calmed myself down. I still couldn't wrap my brain around the fact that I was living without my mom. And after several hours, the sun started to rise and the rain stopped and I finally stopped crying. Now, I was angry. Angry at my mom for leaving me. The pain was replaced with an insane madness. I stood up on my wobbly legs and started destroying anything I could get my hands on. Eli stood behind me, shocked at my outburst. Then he wrapped his arms around my waist as I tried desperately to break free. He sat down on the ground, with me in his lap.

"LET GO OF ME!" I chanted over and over before the sobs won over and I cried some more into Eli's chest.

"She's gone..." I said between sobs. "She's really gone."

I don't know how many hours I sat crying in Eli's lap. But the bright afternoon sun, that was even powerful through the trees was starting to overheat me. In a strange, insane way, this calmed me.

"I want to go home." I said, my voice still thick with tears.

Eli sat up a bit. "Are you sure?"

I nodded. I was exhausted.

Eli stood up, holding on to me and forcing me to stand up to. I felt like I was going to fall, but Eli's arm was around my waist steadying me.

We hobbled out of the woods. My mind must have been playing tricks on me, because I saw my mom standing in the parking lot, leaning on Eli's hearse, smiling at me. I laughed insanely and stepped out of Eli's arm and ran over to his hearse.

"Mom!" I yelled, crying happily. And just as fast as she appeared there, she dissappeared. Eli was behind me again. I turned around and looked at him.

"SHE WAS RIGHT THERE!" I yelled.

Eli just helped me over to the passenger side of the hearse and opened the door for me and practically had to push me in.

"She was right there." I whispered.

Eli nodded, and then went over to the driver side and got in and started it. He started pulling out of the parking lot, and I stared straight ahead. I didn't want to cry, I didn't want anymore insane hallucinations, I didn't want this _pain. _I wanted an escape.

...

**Eli**

Clare stared straight ahead during the ride to her house. I honestly ran out of ideas to comfort her. Seeing her like this made me feel just as bad. I didn't know what to do and I felt like I had failed her.

I pulled into her driveway. There was a small silver car in front of the house. Her dad, or at least I think it was her dad, was sitting on the porch.

"Clare?" he asked confused.

I got out of the car and then went around and opened Clare's door. Her dad ran over and grabbed Clare.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" Clare yelled, punching him in the stomach.

"Clare, sweetie calm down!" he said. "Who are you? Is she okay?" he said, turning towards me.

"I don't know." I said sadly, ignoring the first question.

"Well, thank you for bringing her home." he said.

"Uh, you're welcome."

I wanted to push him out of the way because he was doing a horrible job at comforting her. She just kept punching him, even though she wasn't doing any damage.

"Well, you can go." he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"No sir, I think you should." I said, standing my ground and putting my hands in my pant pockets.

"Uh, what?" he asked, chuckling a bit.

"She doesn't want you here. I don't think that" I said, pointing at Clare punching him "is exactly a welcoming gesture."

"Who are you to tell me something like that? I don't even know who you are! Do you want me to call the cops?" he said, sighing angrily.

"Dad, go home to your stupid fucking bimbo girlfriend and get the _fuck_ out of here!" Clare yelled, stepping closer to me.

Me and her dad both flinched at her outburst. I don't know what shocked me the most, the language or the fierceness of it.

"Sure honey. I'll just uh call you and we can talk about this, when you feel a little better." her dad said shocked, and started walking away.

"Don't freaking bother!" she yelled.

Her dad sighed sadly and got in his car and drove away. Clare looked at me.

"I guess I have to make some... arrangements don't I?" she said, her chin quivering.

"Clare" I said grabbing her hands "you don't have to do that yet."

"I don't know what to do! Just, distract me, please!" she begged.

"Sure, sure." I said, panicking. "Uh, do you want to go inside?"  
Clare stared at the house. "I can't go in there, not yet."

I sighed and opened her door for her again. "Then we're going to my house."

She nodded once and got in the car. I got in the car and backed out of the driveway. I didn't live too far away from her, so we were there in no time. She got out of the car on her own this time and got out. I grabbed her hand and led her inside. My mom wasn't home because she was still on vacation, and my dad doesn't live here anymore. So I took her over to the big leather couch in the living room and she sat down. I sat down next to her and she practically fell over into my lap and fell asleep. I stroked her hair, she looked so... _delicate. _I wanted to stay awake, to make sure she was okay but the exhaustion got to me and I fell asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

** I don't exactly know how many chapters I'm planning on having this story being. It could end at any time. Whenever I feel the time is good and that the story can go no further. Keep reading and thanks for the amazing support! BTW, I have major writer's block. Ideas are greatly appreciated. Leave an idea in your review and I'll be sure to give you credit! This chapter is all from Clare's POV.**

** Clare**

I woke up in a pitch black room. I didn't remember how I got here or where I was. I started to panic as I felt around for a light. I felt someone moving next to me, and I screamed.

"Clare! It's just me!" Eli said, flipping on a lamp.

Then my memory came back.

"Oh. Sorry." I said.

I grabbed my phone out of my pocket and checked the time. It was 9:00 at night.

"I should probably go home now. I guess I can't avoid my dad forever." I said, dialing his number.

"Clare?" my dad answered.

"Hi Dad." I said emotionless.

"Hi sweetie. Where did you go? Are you okay?" he asked.

"I've had better days." I said."Can you come to the house in like 10 minutes?"

"Yeah sure. I'll be right over. Bye." he hung up.

Eli grabbed his keys off the coffee table and stood up. "Ready to go?"

I nodded. He grabbed my hand and we walked outside. He opened the passenger door for me and I sat down. I felt a little nervous. I knew this conversation I was about to have with my dad would be intense. I knew he would say too many things I didn't want to hear. And all too soon, Eli stopped in front of my house. He grabbed my hand and squeezed it.

"Best of luck." he said, smiling sympathetically.

"Thanks." I said, stepping out of the hearse and closing the door behind me. My dad wasn't here yet and I didn't really want to go in the house alone. I knew it would feel too empty, and make my mom's death all too real. I walked up to the front door and timidly unlocked the door. Eli hadn't left yet. I waved weakly, and he slowly drove away.

I stepped inside and shut the door. The house had an eerie feeling, and I knew I'd never be able to comfortably live here ever again. I sat down at the kitchen table and waited for a few minutes. Then there was a soft knock on the door and my dad opened it and stepped inside.

"Hello Clare." he said, slowly walking towards me and sitting down across from me.

"Hi." I said emotionless.

He awkwardly played with the buttons on his shirt. "I'm really sorry."

I stared at the floor. "Don't even start."

He sighed. "Is there anything I can do?"

"Stop talking about it." I said.

He sighed again and leaned in. "Baby, I'm sorry but we gotta start making the arrangements."

Tears filled my eyes but I blinked them back. "I know."

"Not just... for the funeral." he said.

"Honestly, I don't want to live with you and the reason mom isn't here!" I said, slamming my hands on the table.

He flinched. "I wish it didn't happen like that."

"Too much for your conscious to handle, huh dad?" I said, growing angrier.

"Calm down. Getting upset won't change anything."

"I won't live with you and her. I won't." I said.

He sighed. "Alright. Then where are you going to go?"  
"I have no where else to go. That's the problem." I said.

"I'm sure Aunt Laura would take you in." he said. "I just don't know for how long she'd be willing to."

"Then I have no where to go." I said.

"I'm sorry but it looks like you're going to have to live with us."

"Thanks for making my life hell Dad. You're so selfish!" I said, standing up.

He ran his fingers through his hair. "Do you have any good friends?"

"Yes but asking to move in is way too much." I said.

"We'll figure it out." he stood up. "Can you stay at one of your friend's houses tonight?"

"I'll head over to Alli's or something." I said.

"Do you want a ride?" he asked.

"I'd rather walk." I said.

"Clare it's late. You shouldn't be walking outside alone." he said.

I gave him a look and he held up his hands. "Okay, do what you want. Bye Clare."

He walked out the door and I could hear his car start.

I don't think I've ever felt so alone before in my life. I had no where to go.

I went upstairs to get my stuff and stopped at my mom's room. Her door was still open and I slowly closed it. A few tears slipped out but they stopped by the time I got to my room. I threw a few outfits and some personal things in a big tote back and headed downstairs. I honestly didn't want to go to Alli's and I didn't want to stay in this house anymore. I went outside and started walking down the sidewalk. I went in the direction of Eli's house. It didn't take me long to get to his house, and I felt like I was going to be bugging him. So I sat down on a bench on the sidewalk in front of his house, and curled up in a ball. It was freezing cold, so I put on a hoodie I brought but I was still shivering. I wanted to escape reality, I wanted to at least sleep but I knew I never would.

"Clare? What are you doing?" Eli asked, standing behind the bench.

"Honestly, I don't know anymore." I said.

"What happened?" he asked, sitting down next to me.

"I get to move in with my dad and his freaking girlfriend. Yay." I said sarcastically, sitting up.

Eli sighed unhappily. "I'm sorry Clare."

"It's not your fault." I said, crossing my arms.

"Well, let's at least go inside. It's freezing out here." he said, standing up.

I stood up. "No, I've been too much of a pain in the butt for you. I'll just stay here."

He didn't move. "Clare, are you kidding?"

I sighed. "I'll be fine out here."

"Clare, it's like 20 degrees. And I'm lonely." he said, smiling weakly.

I stood up and sighed and followed him inside. The TV was on and he went and sat back down on the leather couch and I followed him. He patted the spot next to him and I sat down.

"I don't know what to do." I said.

"Nothing is your fault." he said, smiling weakly and putting his arm around me.

"I can't live with him and his girlfriend without losing my sanity though." I said.

"Then don't." he said simply, changing the channel on the TV.

"There's no other option." I said.

"Yes there is. There's plenty of room in this house for one more person." he said shrugging.

"Eli, are you kidding?" I asked, completely shocked.

"No. I don't joke." he said.

"I can't accept that. I mean, that's a nice dream but that's impossible." I said.

"No, it's not. My mom let's me do whatever." he said.

"Eli! I'd be living with you. I'm sure you're mom has enough sense to not say okay to that."

"Acutally, she doesn't." he said.

I leaned back on to the couch. "That's still never going to happen."

Eli turned off the TV. "Clare, my mom is barely ever home. And when she is she's too drunk to even give a shit about anything."

I flinched a bit. "It's still too much to ask for. I'll toughen it out at my dad's."

"You shouldn't have to live somewhere where you'd be unhappy." he said. "Now stop finding excuses and just tell you're dad you found a friend to live with."

"I don't even know if he'd let me. He is my legal guardian." I said.

"It sounds like all he wants is some alone time with his new girlfriend and that he really doesn't want you there. I bet he'd be more then happy to have you here. And so would I." he said, smiling.

"Eli, I don't know..." I said.

"No. How about 'Sure thing Eli!'" he said.

"I'm still not convinced this is going to work." I said. "I mean, I want to. More then anything."

"Just trust me Clare. This'll work." he said.


	9. Chapter 9

**I STILL NEED IDEAS. :)**

** Clare**

Eli grabbed the last two suitcases out of the hearse and carried them up to the porch. I stood on his porch, with all the stuff he had already unloaded. He set down the two suitcases next to the others and sighed contently.

The last two weeks had been beyond crazy. I had completely planned my mother's entire funeral, by myself. My dad and his girlfriend showed up, which caused a lot of drama with my mom's family. But other then that, it had gone fairly smoothly and I had gotten the closure that I needed. Then, I called my dad about moving in with Eli. And Eli was right; he was completely happy with the idea and he seemd all too ecstatic to shove me into Eli's house. Eli had insisted that when his mom came home from vacation, that she wouldn't care what was going on and who was living there, but I made him call her and ask. And to my surprise and Eli's general 'I-told-you-so' smugness, she said yes.

And today was move in day. Well, I had been staying here for the past two weeks already, but I had finally emptied out the entire house and sold a bunch of things. My dad had put the house on the market, and it seemed like life was moving too fast. Just a month ago, all Eli was my crush and my English partner, and now he was my best friend and boyfriend. And my mom and dad were still together, and well, she was still alive. It was like my life had made a complete flip.

As far as me and Eli though, things couldn't be going better. We had been spending a ton of time together, and our relationship was blossoming at a good pace.

"You have to help me carry these up the stairs though." he said, smiling as he picked up a tote bag and suitcase.

I laughed. "Fair enough."

...

All of my bags were thrown in a messy pile next to the bed. My new room was their old guestroom. It was nice and simple. Light blue walls, hardwood flooring and a nice big window with white lace curtains. It also included a queen size bed and a dresser and a large spacious closet. I ran and jumped on to the bed and laid down on my back.

"Do you like it?" Eli asked, coming over and sitting down on the edge of my bed.

"Of course!" I said smiling. "Home sweet home."

Eli smiled. "I hope my music won't keep you from getting your beauty sleep. I like to play it really loud, especially at night."

"Luckily, I'm a heavy sleeper." I said smirking.

He smiled and stood up. "Well, I guess I'll let you get settled."

I sat up. "Settled shmettled. I'll have plenty of time to do that." I paused. "I've never seen your room before."

He raised his eyebrows and smirked.

"Eli Goldsworthy, you have such a sick mind!"

He laughed and grabbed my hand and walked down the hall. "Guilty as charged."

He kicked open the room to his door. I was expecting the walls to be black and it to be like a cave in there, but it was pretty basic. The walls were white and he had the same flooring I had in my room. It was pretty plain, except for the big stereo system and a few band posters on the walls.

"What? Were you expecting my bed to be a coffin or something?" he asked.

I laughed. "No!"

We stood in the threshold for a few seconds.

"You know what? You never put any of your music on my iPod like we planned on that one time." I said.

He turned towards me and smiled. "Well, go get it then."

I walked to my room and dug through my bags until I finally found it. Then I went back to Eli's room. He was sitting on his bed with a black laptop in his lap.

I held up my iPod. "Found it."

...

**Eli**

She held up a pink iPod. "Found it."

I patted the spot on my bed next to me. She came over and sat down and handed me the iPod. I plugged it into my laptop and then it popped up on the screen. I clicked on it.

"Oh no, please don't look at the music I have on there already." she said groaning.

I looked at her and smirked. "Why not?"

"Just-just don't." she said, closing her eyes.

I scanned through the list. "Well, I see you have the Twilight soundtrack on here, no surprise there. And some pop music. And what's this?" I said laughing. "Clare Edwards, you listen to rap?"

She hid her face in her hands. "I like a vast array of music."

I laughed and then played one of the rap songs. To my great surprise, it was the explicit version of the song.

"Well, this surprises me." I said.

"Shut up. There's a lot you don't know about me."

I grabbed her tiny wrists and pulled them away from her face. "Well, I guess we are gonna have a lot of time to get to know each other now."

She tried not to smile but she did.

"So, what songs are you gonna add?"

...

We spent the rest of the day listening to music and having a good time together. My mom wasn't coming home from vacation until the end of the week, so me and Clare had the house to ourselves for awhile. This was going to be rather interesting.

...

A parked the hearse in the usual spot. Clare hopped out of the car and came over and grabbed my hand. This was Clare's first day back to school in a few weeks, but I hadn't missed as many days as she had.

We walked up the front stairs, hand in hand. People gave us weird looks, we hadn't exactly told many people that we were official. Then of course, Clare's annoying friend Alicia or whatever her face is come bounding down the stairs and tackles Clare in a hug.

"Clare! You're back!" she squealed.

"Alli" she laughed "it's not that big of a deal."

Ah, so her name was Alli. I rolled my eyes. I can't believe Clare was friends with someone this annoying.

Alli was one of the few people Clare had told about where she is living now and about our relationship. We didn't really need any rumors starting about anything, so we were trying not to tell many people.

Clare and Alli were deep in conversation so I went inside. That blonde bimbo Clare was enemies with because she stole her past boyfriend or something like that walked by. She stared at me in a way that made me a bit uncomfortable. I glared at her and continued on my way.

...

"So, you're actually living with Eli?" Alli asked quietly.

"Yup." I said.

"Isn't that kinda weird? I mean, you guys haven't been together all that long."

"No. We were friends before we were together so it's going just fine." I shrugged.

K.C. walked down the stairs. He looked at me for a second until he saw my look back at him. He nervously scratched his neck and then walked away. That was odd.

"You're not seriously checking out K.C. are you?" Alli asked.

"What? Alli, of course not!" I said.

"Well guess what? K.C. _dumped_ Jenna last week!" she said it like it was the greatest news ever spoken.

"Oh." was all I managed to say as I uncomfortabely crossed my legs.

How did I feel about that? Why did a part of me feel a bit happy about that? Not just because it was what Jenna deserved, but because K.C. was now single. I shook those thoughts out, I was with Eli now I could not be thinking about K.C.!


	10. Chapter 10

**Okay, how many of you have seen the new promos for new episodes of Degrassi and have seent he Eclare stuff? Gah, they finally get together! And then did you see where Eli is like "Sorry I led you on." and Clare goes "Wow." I wanted to get up and punch Eli through my TV. And have you heard all these crazy rumors about how Eli dies during the lockdown?**

** Clare**

Math class. I like math, I just don't like this class specifically. My assigned seat is directly behind KC, and Jenna is directly to his left. So everyday up until now, for 45 minutes, I got to watch them be all flirty and disgusting. And it still hurt every time I saw them together. I mean, KC was my first love, and that makes him hard to get over. I still have these pesky feelings for him, that just keep bugging me. I do have more feelings towards Eli of course, but I can't get KC out of my head! And I guess that explains why I'm happy that KC dumped Jenna. And not just because Jenna deserved it.

"Good morning class," the teacher said as he walked in. "To review for the test tomorrow I made a practice test that you can work on with a partner."

The class nodded excitedly. Partner work? Geez, don't teachers get when they let you work with a friend that you aren't actually going to work?

"_Assigned_ partners." the teacher said.

Everyone groaned. He went around the room, assigning partners who sat close to each other. I wanted to slam my head into my desk. That means I have a pretty good chance of being stuck with Jenna! Or KC...

"Jenna you are partners with Jason. And KC, you are partners with Clare." the teacher said as he dropped worksheets on our desks.

Why did my heart just skip a beat? Oh no, physical reactions. This was worse then I thought.

KC turned his desk around so he was facing me. I stared down at the desk top.

"Hey Clare. I heard about your mom. I'm really sorry." he smiled sympathetically.

And wow, I almost temporarily forgot about that.

"Uh, thanks." I said, nervously picking at my nails.

"So, uh how are you?" he asked, awkwardly running his hands through his hair.

I looked up. "Fine."

He sighed and took out a pencil.

"So, for the first problem. Where do I reduce?" he asked.

...

KC walked out of class right behind me. We were both laughing at something stupid Jenna had said to him at the end of class. And surprisingly, class went really well. It was like old times, before me and KC were in a relationship.

"We should hangout sometime Clare. I miss you. As a friend." he quickly added.

I nodded. "We should."

I looked up and Eli was walking towards me. When he saw who I was talking to, his face fell.

He walked up next to me and grabbed my hand.

"Hey Clare." he said, glaring at KC.

"Uh hey. Eli this is KC, KC this is Eli." I don't think they've officially met, but they definately knew who each other was.

I looked down at our hands. Me and Eli had agreed we weren't gonna exactly make it too obvious we were dating. Was he jealous?

"Hello." Eli said emotionless.

"Uh, hi." KC said.

"Well, see you later KC." I said, walking away with Eli.

Eli stopped and pulled me into a corner. "I thought you hated him? Didn't he dump you for that blondie cheerleader?"

"Don't be upset. We decided to be friends."

"Even after what he did to you?" Eli asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Yes. That doesn't matter when it comes to our friendship." I said.

He sighed. "Wow Clare. I didn't think you'd be the type of person to forgive someone so easily." he said, starting to walk away.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I followed after him and grabbed his wrist. He turned around.

"Nothing." he said.

"You don't have to be jealous Eli. Trust me." I said.

"Who says I'm jealous?" he said, turning around again and walking away.

...

**Eli**

Gah. I wasn't the jealous type, but seeing Clare all giddily happy with KC... Well, what guy wouldn't be jealous seeing his girlfriend all happy with her ex? I really didn't like this new "friendship" they established. I didn't trust that dude as far as I could throw him, and I was picking up this weird vibe. I doubt he wanted to be just friends with her! I mean, he just dumped that blonde bimbo like 5 minutes ago and now he wants to be "friends" with his ex? I can feel the paranoia consuming me already.

I sat down in my desk in English. A few seconds later, Clare sat down behind me. She didn't say anything. Crap.

I turned around. "Uh, hey."

"Hi." she said, emotionless, not even looking at me. Ouch, cold.

"You aren't... mad at me are you?" I said. Damn, I just totally sounded like a 6 year old.

"You don't trust me." she said, it wasn't a question.

"Of course I do." I said, sinking down in my chair so I could look up in to her eyes. She looked at the floor now.

She didn't say anything.

"Clare, I was jealous. Jealousy makes people do stupid idiotic things. I'm sorry." I said.

She finally looked up. "It's okay."

"I trust you I just don't trust him." I said.

She thought for a second and then sighed. "Okay, I understand. If you don't trust him I'll stay away from him."

"No, I can't ask you to do that." I said, feeling bad. Wow, I totally do not deserve her.

She shook her head. "No. It's fine. You're right. I shouldn't forgive him."

I grabbed her hand and she smiled weakly. Then class started.

...

Clare told me she had a yearbook meeting after schooI and she said she would walk home after the meeting. I hated being in the house alone, since before Clare moved in I was always alone here, so I stayed at school to do a little studying and then headed over to The Dot to get a coffee or something. I parked the hearse and got out and walked across the street. I walked inside and ordered a coffee and sat down and waited. Then I paid for my coffee and stood up. I turned to retrieve my backpack off the floor. As I did, my gaze fell on a table in the corner, and I practically dropped my coffee. There sat Clare, holding hands across the table with KC, giggling at something he said. The anger ran through my veins as I immediately ran towards the table, not caring if I was making a scene. Clare's head snapped up, and when she saw me she went pale. KC turned around to see what she was looking at, and when he saw me he smiled in a "Ha-ha" kind of way.

"What the hell?" I said.

"Eli!" Clare said, immediately letting go of KC's hands.

"So much for 'I shouldn't forgive him' huh Clare?" I said.

Clare ran her fingers through her hair. "Eli please just let me explain."

"Explain what? There is nothing to explain Clare do you think I'm blind?" I yelled.

"Dude, chill." KC said, rolling his eyes.

"Shut the hell up! You know what Clare? Have fun getting you're heart broken again. I'll put your stuff on my porch." I said.

Clare went paler, if that's even possible. I shook my head in disbelief and ran out the door, not caring who was staring at me.


	11. Chapter 11

**You guys wanted more, so I updated ASAP! :)**

** Clare**

KC and I decided to go to The Dot after school, to talk. We just wanted to catch up, as _friends. _So as difficult as it was, I had to lie to Eli and tell him that me and KC weren't going to be friends. I thought I was doing a good thing, I didn't want him upset over it!

We walked in The Dot. I thought this was a safe enough place. Sure there'd be a lot of people from school who'd talk about me and KC being here together, but it wasn't like Eli listened to gossip. And I didn't think Eli would ever show up here, I remembered once he said that it wasn't his "scene."

KC bought me a coffee and we sat down, talking about everything that had been going on in our lives. Apparently, he moved in with his mom and he broke up with Jenna because she was too clingy. I told him about my parents, and how I moved in with Eli. He kind of stiffened when I talked about Eli, which I thought was a little odd. Then the conversation turned a little lighter and he showed me this magic trick he learned, which I thought was a little dorky but I played along. Apparently, he could make a dime dissapear through our joined hands. So he held my hands across the table.

"And alcazaam!" he yelled.

I laughed. "You're such a dork."

Then I looked up, and all the blood drained from my face. Eli was approaching the table, and the expression on his face terrified me.

...

Eli turned and ran out the door. I got up and ran after him, but he was already in the hearse and driving away from The Dot. I didn't waste any time as I took off sprinting towards his house. This could not be happening I had to explain, I had to make things okay! Eli was practically everything to me now, and where else would I go if he kicked me out? I would die if I had to live with my dad!

The panic was creeping it's way up my throat, and I had trouble breathing. I had to stop and rest, panting and feeling lightheaded. Good thing I was almost to his house. I felt so weak I didn't know if I could run anymore.

I ran up the porch steps and tried opening the door but it was locked. I rang the doorbell repeatedly, and finally the door swung open and a bag was thrust into my arms.

"Now get out of here." he said, his eyes as cold as ice.

"Eli." I said, my voice trailing off as tears welled in my eyes. "Don't do this please. Please, let me explain."

He tried closing the door but I put my foot in the threshold. I dropped the bag.

"You have to hear me out. You just have to. You can't do this." I said, the tears finally spilling out.

"I can and I have." he said.

"Eli!" I pleaded.

He stood there for a few moments. His face was tight and expressionless.

"Fine." he opened the door and walked inside towards the living room. I followed him to the couch and sat down.

I reached for his hand but he pulled it away.

"I lied about KC because I saw how much it upset you and I didn't want to sneak around behind your back-" he cut me off.

"Whatever Clare. Get out and I'm serious."

"I wasn't finished!" I yelled through clenched teeth. He sighed and stood there.

"He was my friend before he was my boyfriend. Like we were. And I just wanted to catch up and I didn't want you to worry. I should have been honest, I know. I didn't want to hurt you, that was the last thing I wanted. And he isn't worth losing you, not in the least. I'm so sorry Eli." I said.

He relaxed a bit. He sat back down.

"God, Clare I'm such an ass. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions."

"Don't blame yourself. It's no one's fault but my own." I paused. "But do you not trust me?"

"I told you before, I do." he said.

"If you did trust me, you wouldn't have assumed that. I mean the lie probably didn't help, but you still shouldn't have assumed that." I frowned.

He stared at the floor. "I guess I don't trust you."

I jumped up. "What did I do to make you not trust me though?"

"Clare, it isn't like that. I h-have a hard time trusting people." Eli said.

"I'm your girlfriend though! How can we have any sort of relationship if you don't trust me?"

He sighed. "I don't know."

And I thought the problem was solved? This problem just opened up a new one.

...

**Eli**

"I don't know." I said.

Her face fell. I was so confused. I needed time to think. It took me a long time to trust people, but I knew Clare would never want to be with me if she thought I didn't trust her.

"Clare-" I began.

"Then I guess I need to get my stuff then don't I?" she said, tears streaming down her face.

"No!" I yelled, standing up.

"This obviously isn't going to work out. I'll just get my bag and the rest of the stuff in my room and I'll be out of your way."

"No Clare. I-I didn't want this to happen though!" he said.

"And you think I did?" she said, wiping the tears from her face.

"Can you just give me some time to think?" I asked.

"Take all the time you need." she said as she headed upstairs.

And there was the second breakup line I have heard from her today.

...

I knew I couldn't stop Clare. I tried just about everything but she was right, we needed to break up or take a break or something. All too soon, she had her stuff packed up and was heading downstairs to be picked up by her dad. And just this morning, I thought our relationship was going awesome-ly.

She dragged her stuff out to the car and then stood by the car. Neither of us knew what to say.

"Well, thanks for letting me live here for the past month or so." she said, opening the door and getting in and slamming it.

The car backed out of the driveway and drove away. And it took a piece of me with it.

...

**AND YOU THOUGHT THE DRAMA WAS OVER? Review please!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Gah, so much Eclare goodness in Degrassi this week. :)**

_3 weeks later..._

** Eli**

Lonely. Even the actual word 'lonely', looks rather lonely. I hadn't realized how big of a chunk of my life Clare was. And with her gone, it felt like I was missing a vital organ. Like my... heart.

Damn, I should write poetry.

...

I slid into my English seat, I could feel Clare's gaze boring into my back. To say Clare was upset would be the biggest understatement of the year. We hadn't spoken a word to each other since... well you know. She had asked Ms. Dawes for a new writing partner, which was basically like a slap in the face. The only sort of communication I got from her, was the pissed off looks she kept giving me.

And why don't I friggen trust her? Why can't I trust any friggen person?

For that, I blame my parents.

They were barely around for my entire childhood. My mom was always "so stressed out" that she "needed a vacation." Her little "vacations" were actually week long visits to the local bar; where she spent every penny she had on booze and slot machines. So she left for weeks on end, leaving me with my drunken asshole of a father. My mom and dad got divorced when I was 5. They had shared custody, which neither of them really wanted. So they threw me back and forth from each other like I was a football. They were both alcoholics. My mom was a "happy" drunk. I actually liked her better when she was drunk. When she was sober, she was always cranky and if I caught her in a bad enough mood she would take it out on me.

My dad was an "angry" drunk. I had to avoid him whenever he wasn't 100% sober, otherwise he would beat me up. It got bad enough where I had to sleep outside when he was drunk, otherwise he'd come into my room and hurt me.

But I don't just blame my parents. I blame Jenni too.

Because of all of them, I can't believe that there is anyone in this world who wants to do something other then hurt me. Whether that be physically or emotionally. And because of that, I can't be with Clare.

...

**Clare**

I couldn't stand living with my dad and his flusey girlfriend. First of all, she was like 25. That's 20 year younger then my dad. Second of all, how can he possibly believe that this flusey loves him? She has her "business partner" male friends come home all the time, when my dad is at home, and they go upstairs to work on "business." God, when did my dad get so naive? She is having multiple affairs right under his nose!

Another thing I couldn't stand about living here, is that I don't belong here at all. My dad wasn't thrilled at all that I was coming to live with him, and I wasn't even surprised. He tried to see if I had another friend who would take me in. He even tried all of the relatives to see if they would take me. It was like I was some sad puppy dog he found on the side of the road that he didn't want but he had enough conscious to find it a home.

When did I suddenly lose my place in this world?

...

The Eli breakup situation was killing me inside. I thought I had finally found someone that I truly connected with. But he didn't trust me? A relationship's foundation was trust. I can't believe he led me on for so long. It was like he was playing games with me, and this was a game I was _not_ going to play any longer. But why can't I get him out of my mind?

...

KC strolled up to me in the hallway.

"Hey Clare!" he said.

I smiled. "Hey!"

"So I really don't get those permutations we're doing in math class. Wanna meet me at the Dot after school for a study session?"

KC and I had been spending a lot of time together lately. He was a nice distraction from everything else in my life. And I knew he wanted more then just a friendship again, but I wasn't sure. Me and Eli's breakup still hurt, and I wasn't ready to throw myself into another relationship. I didn't want to make KC a rebound and then have it crash and burn. But he was being patient, and I was hoping that sometime soon I'd be able to get over Eli. But why am I feeling like that's going to be impossible? Why is he so hard to get over?

"Sure KC. That sounds nice." I said, emotionless.

...

** Kind of a short chapter, and it's sort of a filler! Sorry :( I know this chapter left you all in suspense! Don't worry, Eclare is not going to be over! And if you're wondering who this mysterious Jenni person is that Eli talked about, she's his ex. Please review and I'll have a nice long chapter up soon!**


	13. Chapter 13

** A lot of questions were asked in the reviews for last chapter! Yes, I do realize from the show that Eli's girlfriend was not named Jenni. I changed it around. I also realize that the last chapter was terrible. I've had writer's block for awhile but I finally got some nice ideas from a friend that will improve the story! And no I do not like torturing you guys with them broken up, they won't be apart for much longer! Please keep reading and reviewing! Here's a nice long chapter you have all been waiting for! :)**

** Clare**

I walked out of the Dot. KC followed. We said bye and we went in seperate directions. I guess that could be considered a date, it wasn't exactly a friendly get together. It was too intense though, I knew that it wasn't going to workout. The chemistry we used to have was gone, and I knew I still wasn't ready for another relationship. I sighed and walked down the sidewalk, not exactly eager to go home. It felt like I had nothing to live for, my only girl friend, Alli, abandoned me to hangout with the cooler kids, my mom was dead and my dad didn't care about me anymore, Adam (who I was sort of friends with while me and Eli were together) ignored me, and Eli and I had broken up. I literally had no one anymore. It seems like the only thing I had anymore was the Lord. I touched the cross I wore around my neck; if I didn't have Him, I don't know if I could keep going. I had been spending a lot of time at Church lately, I went to every service and helped out with anything I could. I was trying to keep myself busy.

I passed by an alley as I heard the soft pain-filled cries of a voice I recognized. I stopped dead in my tracks and turned and ran down the alley. In a bloody heap, there laid Eli, barely conscious.

"Eli!" I screamed, terrified as I kneeled down to him.

...

**Eli**

The icing on the shit cake that resembles my life, is that this asshole Fitz or whatever seems to have a bad case of Too-Much-Testosterone-In-My-System-So-Let's-Find-Someone-To-Try-And-Beat-Up syndrome. It all started when him and his girly little posse were standing in my usual parking spot.

"Um, excuse me!" I yelled out the window of the hearse as I was halfway pulled into the spot.

He turned around and smirked and then turned back to his friends.

"Okay, what's wrong with you?" I yelled.

He turned around and ripped the skull shaped hood ornament off of Morty. Alright, now this got personal.

I jumped out of the hearse and slammed the door and ran up to him. "Give me that."

He chucked it into the fence behind him.

"Do you want a tissue?" he said sarcastically.

"Go get it." I barked.

He looked past me. "What are you looking at it?"

"Still trying to figure that out." I recognized Adam's voice.

"This isn't over." he said as he and his friends walked away.

...

Ever since then, we were in a war. It escalated from a fight in front of the school, that ended with him kneeing me where you _don't_ want to be kneed, to a brawl in the parking lot that ended with him getting a black eye and me getting some nice bruises. Oh well, they made me look tough.

And lucky for me, one morning Morty broke down and I didn't have enough time to fix him _and _get to school on time. So I got to walk. On the way home after school, I passed by an alley. Fitz suddenly popped out and stood in front of me, his friends went around and stood behind me.

"Dudes, as much as I would love to kick your asses again I am really got to get home." I said, trying to step around Fitz.

"Aww, Eli's gotta get home to ma-ma and da-da." he laughed.

Really? What was this, second grade?

"Fine." I dropped my backpack. "If you want me to kick your ass, then I gladly will."

I pushed Fitz into a dumpster in the alley. He fell in and before I knew it his friends tackled me. I tried to defend myself, but they had me pinned. One of them kept punching me in the head, and the other kept kicking me in the sides. Then Fitz joined them, and he pulled out a pocketknife.

I gulped. Fitz approached me with the knife. I was barely conscious, my head was bleeding badly. I tried everything to push them off, but I was too dizzy and weak to do anything. Fitz pushed the guys off of me and stood over me. Then he stabbed me. In the shoulder. I screamed in pain, and Fitz and his friends grabbed their backpacks and left. I tried to pull it out, but I couldn't bring myself to move. I wish I would just pass out already, the pain was too unbearable. Then I heard footsteps of someone approaching. I assumed it was Fitz again. I tried to tell scream to him to just finish me off already, and put me out of this pain.

"Eli!" a voice I knew all too well screamed in horror.

I opened my eyes. Was I dead already? There was Clare, ripping her sleeve off her shirt and wrapping it around my head to stop the bleeding.

"Eli, try to stay awake!" she screamed.

"Clare..." I whimpered. I wanted to stay awake, to stay awake with her. But I lost the battle with my consciousness, and everything went black.

...

**Clare**

I sat in the hospital waiting room. It reminded me of the time me and Eli sat here, waiting for the news about my mom. So sitting here with all the unpleasent memories was not a fun way to spend my afternoon; but I wasn't going to leave until I found out if Eli was okay. No one else showed up, even though the paramedics has called his parents in the ambulance. So I rode in the back of the ambulance with him. He would need someone to be with him when he woke up, and I doubted I would be his first choice for that but I had enough conscious not to just go home.

A short while later, a doctor approached me.

"Are you Elijah Goldsworthy's sister?" he asked.

"No, I'm his... well, I'm the one who found him in the alley." I said.

He nodded. "Is there any of his family here?"

I shook my head.

"Well, we stitched up his head and shoulders. He didn't have a concussion which is good, and the stab wound wasn't too deep and we stitched that up too. He lost quite a lot of blood though so we're keeping him here for a few days to moniter him. I don't know if you want to see him or not but he's in room 136."

"Okay, thank you." I stood up and grabbed my purse. I walked down the hospital walkway towards his room. I was hoping he'd be asleep, so I could just leave him a note saying I was there and that I hope he felt better and wouldn't have to actually talk to him. I mean, it would be completely awkward and uncomfortable if I had to talk to him. I got to his room; and I was crazy nervous as I knocked a couple times on the door and then opened it. I stepped inside and lucky for me, he was wide awake.

"Uh, hi." I said, as I closed the door behind me.

"Hi." he said blankly.

Let the awkwardness begin. I walked over to his bed. He looked terrible, he was really pale and his face was so covered in stitches I barely recognized him.

"How are you feeling?" I asked quietly.

"Never better." he said, a bit sarcastic.

I sighed. "How did this happen?"

"Fitz." he said, his voice hoarse.

"Did you tell them he did this?" I asked.

"Yeah, he got arrested." he said, as he fiddled with the IV in his arm.

"Good." I said.

We sat there in silence for a few moments.

"Well, I hope you feel better." I said, as I walked towards the door.

"Clare, wait." he said.

I turned around. "Yes?"

"Uh, thank you for-" I cut him off and held up my hand to stop him.

"It's fine." I said, opening the door.

"And" he said in a tone that made me stop. "can we talk sometime? About, well you know."

Was he serious? "What else is there to say?"

His face fell. "I just don't like that we walk around like we hate each other."

I shrugged. "That's kind of what happens after a breakup."

"Who says it has to be though?" he asked.

I turned around and walked back over to his bed and sat down in one of the chairs that was up against the wall. "I certaintly don't like it. I thought it was what you wanted though."

He chuckled. "Not even close."

I stared at the floor.

"Clare, look at me."

I slowly looked up.

He paused for a few seconds. "I do trust you. Most people wouldn't have done what you did for me today." he smiled a bit. "It's just, I don't want to believe you want to be good to me. It's like... I have a sheild."

"Uh, what?" I asked confused.

"I've only had one other girlfriend before. And she cheated on me. Completely ripped my heart right out of my chest."

"Oh, sorry." I said.

"And my parents don't give a rat's ass about me. I don't have many people in my life, and because of that and what has happened in the past I don't want to believe there is anyone out there who wants to do something other then hurt me. So I put these walls up. And I realize now that was never your intention, and I'm so dumb for thinking that. We can't just throw this all away because of my stupidity, can we?" he smiled weakly.

I couldn't resist a small smile. "I guess I shouldn't have just dumped you because of that. I should have given you a bit of time."

"Hey, no one's perfect." he said.

I smiled. "Has your life been as crappy as mine has been?"

He nodded. "Can we try this again? Please?"

I stood up. "I want to, but-" he cut me off.

"But you're afraid of getting hurt again?" he finished for me.

I nodded.

"So am I. But if we don't take a chance, we're just gonna keep being miserable."

I froze. "You're right."  
He smirked. "Aren't I always?"

I playfully punched his good shoulder.

"That's really nice. Beat up the guy who just got 40 stitches." he smiled.

I laughed. "Man up."

He grabbed my hand, which was still resting on his shoulder and pulled me towards him. Our faces were just inches away. He looked into my eyes, in the way that made me melt inside. He cupped my face and leaned up and kissed me. Oh gosh have I missed this.

"Clare, I love you." he said.

"I love you too." I smiled.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14- The Questions Game**

** THIS ONE IS ALL FROM ELI'S POV.**

Clare left a short while later. Words can't even described how much better I felt. To be able to know Clare was mine, was the greatest gift anyone could have given me. And I knew from here on out, that things were going to be much _much_ better. Once again, the cartoon rain cloud hanging over my head, raining down on me, was lifted.

I spent the rest of the day watching TV. I hated hospitals, so I was anxious to get out of here, or at least to see Clare again. She had promised me she'd be back first thing in the morning, but that seemed like forever away. At around 9:00 that night, a nurse came in and put something that would help me fall asleep in my IV. Then I happily drifted off to sleep.

...

I woke up groggily the next morning. I was exhausted even though I had slept soundly, but the sleeping drug was probably still in my system.

"He's alive!" Adam said.

Clare walked into the room with two styrofoam coffee cups and handed one to Adam as she sipped the other one. She smiled at me.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" she asked, as she sat down next to Adam.

"Tired." I chuckled.

"Oh, do you want us to leave then?" she asked.

Was she kidding? "No!" I sat up, which took most of my energy.

She put the coffee cup on the table next to my bed. "I brought Adam too."

I nodded. "I see that."

"Hey bro." he waved.

I rolled my eyes and laughed, and imitated his wave and waved back.

"I'd punch you right now, but that's probably not a good idea." Adam said laughing.

I laughed and tried to adjust my pillow. The IV and lack of energy basically restrained me from doing so though.

Clare got up and came over and adjusted the pillow.

"Better?" she asked.

"Very." I grinned. Clare smiled and leaned down and kissed me quickly.

"Ew." Adam said.

Clare grabbed one of the extra pillows that was above my bed and chucked it at him. Dang, she fiestier then I remembered.

Adam caught the pillow before it could hit him in the face. Clare reached for another one.

"Don't start a pillow fight!" I said. They both laughed.

Adam stood up. "Well, I better get going. I got to get to work soon."

"Work?" me and Clare both asked in unison. We then looked at each other and laughed.

"Yeah, my parents made me get a job. You're looking at the new custodian at McDonald's." he said.

Me and Clare started laughing. "Custodian?" she asked.

"Yup. I had to take an 8 hour training course for it yesterday." he said.

"A training course? To learn what? The custodial arts?" I said, me and Clare burst into a fit of laughter again.

"Shut up you two." Adam said.

"We're just kidding." Clare said, as she stopped laughing.

"Yeah yeah. Well, feel better Eli. See you Clare." he said as he left.

Clare sat down on the edge of my bed.

"Let's talk." she said.

"About what?" I asked.

"Everything. How'd you sleep last night?"

"Fine. They gave me some sleeping drugs."

"I wish I had some of those." she mumbled.

Then I noticed the dark circles under her eyes. She was paler then normal, and her eyes were sort of bloodshot.

"Woah, why aren't you getting any sleep?" I asked.

"I can't stand my dad and his girlfriend's house. I have to sleep on the couch every night and I can never get a good night's sleep there."

"I wish you could move back in with me. But it's probably not a good idea." I said.

"Why not?" she asked.

"My mom's back from vacation and she came back a whole new person. And not in a good way. My mom's a complete drunk." I said,

"Oh." she said, as she intertwined her fingers with mine.

"It sucks. I wish she would go back on vacation." I said.

She frowned in a sympathetic way."What about your dad?"  
"Even worse. They're both drunks." I said.

She frowned. "I'm sorry."  
"Not your fault." I said.

She looked into my eyes for a few seconds. Then she gently touched the swollen area where the stiches were on my face. I winced. She quickly pulled her hand away.

"Sorry." she said.

"Nah, it's fine."

We sat in silence for a few minutes. I patted the spot next to me and Clare came and sat beside me.

"Let's ask each other questions." she said, breaking the silence.

I chuckled. "Questions?"

"Yeah. I'll ask you any question and you have to answer honestly, and vice versa. So I'll go first." she paused. "What's your favorite color?"

"Blue." I blurted out.

"Blue?" she asked. "I would have thought it was-"

"Black?" I finished for her.

"Uh yeah." she said.

"Black's cool, but your eyes are blue." I said.

She blushed. I missed making her blush like that.

"Okay your turn." she said.

"What's _your_ favorite color?" I asked.

"Green." she said.

I smirked. "Why? Because _my_ eyes are green?"

"Exactly." she smiled. "My turn. Hmm, when's your birthday?"

"March 9th." I said. "When is your birthday?"

"Stop stealing my questions." she smiled. "June 11th."

...

We spent the next few hours playing the Questions game. It progressed from simple questions to bigger questions. I found out that her sister Darcy was on a mission trip in Kenya, and that Clare was a frequent Church-goer. I also found out that Clare had a purity ring, and that she wrote Twilight fan fiction (which I laughed to myself about.)

"Are you Team Edwin or Team Jacob?" I asked when it was my turn, smirking.

"It's EDWARD." she said. "And I'm Team Edward."

"Is that one the vampire?" I asked.

"Hey, it's my turn!" she said. "What is your biggest pet peeve?"

"Wanna-be's. Now answer my last question."

"Yes, that one is the vampire. Now, why do you drive the hearse?"

"I'm obsessed with death." I said.

She smacked me. "No, seriously!"

"My grandpa ran a funeral business and when he died he gave it to my family so my parents gave it to me." I said.

She nodded. "Okay, your turn."

"Why are you Team EdWIN." I said, just to bug her.

"EDWARD!" she yelled. I laughed. "And because he was waiting for someone like Bella for decades, and so his heart is huge even though he doesn't technically have one."

I smirked. "Oh yeah? Well, I'm Team Jacob so what are you gonna do about it?" I laughed.

She smacked me again. Then I heard the door open. I looked over Clare's shoulder. I groaned in horror.

My parents walked in, keeping their distance from each other. It took everything in me not to grab the radio off the table next to me and hurl it at them.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15 - Reconciliation**

** Clare**

Eli abrubtly stopped laughing and his expression turned cold. I blinked, confused. I turned around. Standing just inside the door was two people who I was guessing was Eli's parents. They were standing as far away from each other as possible, and they looked sort of... intimidated. I immediately got off the bed, and I could feel my cheeks flush. I looked over at Eli, the expression on his face was unreadable.

"What are _you guys_ doing here?" Eli said acidely. He said "you guys" like most people would say the word "parasites."

Eli's mom dropped her gaze to the floor. His dad shifted his weight, visibly uncomfortable.

"We... we got a phone call from the hospital yesterday. We came as soon as-" Eli's mom began.

"As what? As soon as you were sobered up?" Eli asked, raising his voice.

Eli's mom choked on tears. I kind of felt bad for her. I was going to give Eli a warning look, but this wasn't my business. The tension in the room was thick, and I didn't think I needed to be here.

Everyone was silent for several moments. I grabbed my purse off a chair.

"Well, uh I'm going to get going. Bye." I said, awkwardly walking past his parents and out the door of the room. I walked down the hospital corrider and down to the first floor and out the automatic doors.

...

**Eli**

"Elijah," my mom began. "Me and... and your father" she looked over at him, her expression hard when she said his name. "Know that we have messed up."

"Son, we didn't want things to ever get this bad." my dad said.

I clenched my fists.

"We talked this morning, and me and your father both agreed we need to starting going to some AA counseling." my mom said, reaching for my hand but I pulled it away.

"What are you saying?" I asked, trying to keep my tone leveled.

"We want you to be back in our lives. We never see you anymore. And we know we need help." my dad said.

I stiffened. "You do need help. But I can't have you just waltz back in my life and mess everything up again."

"Believe me, that's the last thing we want to do!" my mom pleaded.

I sighed. "So that's what it takes to make you see the light? A knife in my shoulder?"

My mom's eyes were sparkly with tears. "Eli, I'm so sorry."

"So am I." I barked sarcastically.

My mom flinched. We sat in silence for a few minutes.

"Is there anything we can do?" my Dad finally asked, breaking the uncomfortable silence.

"No." I said, emotionless.

My parents exchanged looks. I didn't care if I was being stubborn, after everything they've done there is no way I can just pretend like it never happened.

...

**Clare**

I opened the door and stepped inside. It was raining outside, and since I had to walk home from the hospital I was soaked. I peeled off my wet shoes and socks and wrang the water out of my hair. I was freezing, and my teeth were chattering. I headed upstairs and took a long, hot shower. I was still freezing when I got out, so I put on heavy clothes and my fuzzy slippers. I wasn't sure what would happen between Eli and his parents, and I figured that it was probably best not to go back to visit until tomorrow morning. I spent the rest of the morning lazily watching TV on my couch/bed. My dad and his girlfriend came home around noon, I didn't know where they had been all morning, nor did I care.

"Hey kitten?" I heard my dad call from the kitchen. I assumed he ment his girlfriend.

"What, are you ignoring me?" my dad asked, a few seconds later.

I turned around and faced towards the kitchen.

"Wait, me?" I asked.

My dad stepped into the living room. "Yes you." he laughed.

"Oh. Uh, what's up Dad?" I hadn't had a conversation with him in weeks.

"Well, me and Stacy just went to go visit your grandma." he said.

So his girlfriend's name was Stacy? Was it pathetic or just plain dumb that I never learned her name?

"Oh." was all I could manage to say.

"And it turns out that Grandma would love to have you move in with her! They have a great high school just a block from her house that we could enroll you in-" I cut him off.

"Woah. Why do I have to move?" I exclaimed.

My dad looked taken aback. "I thought you didn't like it here."

"I don't. But I don't want to move away from Degrassi." I said.

My dad's face fell. I knew he was looking for the first opprotunity he could to shove me out of his house.

"Why not?" he asked blankly.

"I have friends here. And a life. I don't want to start over somewhere else."

His expression suddenly turned angry. "This is about that Eric kid you used to live with right? What is he, your boyfriend? Clare, you're so young, you can't give up all these opprotunities for some silly fling!"

"First of all, his name is Eli. And second of all, what opprotunity? The opprotunity for you to shove me out of the house so you don't have to be my guardian anymore? So you and that... and that slut you call a girlfriend can mess around without having me in the picture?"

"You will _not_ talk about Stacy that way." my Dad said firmly.

"Whatever Dad. I'm sorry I'm such a burden for you." I said, my voice thick with sarcasm.

"Clarebear, that is not what I meant." my Dad said.

"Yes, it most certaintly was. You just don't want to admit it because it would be too much for your conscious to handle."

I kicked my slippers off, not caring where they landed. Then I ran to the front room, where my still damp shoes were and slid them on. I choked back tears, not wanting to cry just yet. Then I ran up the stairs, to the linen closet at the top where I kept my clothes. I yanked it open and started grabbing armsfuls of things and shoving them into my school bag. My dad ran up the stairs and put an arm on my shoulder.

"Clare, honey, what are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm doing you a favor!" I screamed between clenched teeth as I zipped up the bag and ran back down the stairs.

"Clare, stop please!" my Dad said.

I turned around, I had never been more angry before in my life.

"You ruined my life. You killed mom." I said, not able to fight the tears any longer.

My dad went pale. "Clare-"

I cut him off again.

"And now I'm just an annoyance you have to deal with because of it, aren't I? I don't want to be somewhere I'm not wanted. Enjoy your precious time with your girlfriend." I said, barely able to keep my voice firm because of the tears. I opened the door and slammed it behind me.

And what kills me, is that a little piece of me was hoping he'd open the door. And tell me that everything I just said wasn't true. I waited a few seconds, and he never did. I took off running, knowing that he wasn't going to chase after me. I was right. I just gave him the perfect setup, I left on my own. Less guilt for him, so he wouldn't feel bad about it later. I didn't know where I was going to go. Once again, I had no place in this world. I was going in the direction of the hospital, but I didn't want to bother Eli and his parents. If they were finally going to establish some peace, I didn't want to interupt it. My run slowed into a walk, as I gasped for air. I felt lightheaded. I had also never felt more alone before in my life.

...

**Eli**

My parents left a short while later. Nothing had been resolved, and I doubted they were going to come back. They were probably going to head off in seperate directions to go to different bars. It was just past noon now, and I still had 3 more days left in the hospital. I thought about calling Clare, but she probably had things to do and it was selfish of me to ask her to hangout here in the hospital all day.

...


	16. Chapter 16

**2 chapters in one day :)**

** And guess who will have a little POV in this chapter? Adam!**

** Eli**

I asked the nurse for more sleeping drugs. I was bored out of my mind and I figured I might as well rest until I was released. But a dread filled me, where would I go when I got released? My parents probably felt bad that I got stabbed, that's the only reason they came. Then things are going to go right back to the way they were.

The nurse put the drugs in my IV, and I immediately began to feel tired. I sank slowly into unconsciousness, but there was this nagging feeling somewhere deep down that kept pulling my awake right when I was about to fall asleep. It was weird, it felt like something was wrong but I couldn't put my finger on it. I immediately regretted asking for the drugs, but soon enough the battle between consciousness and unconsciousness ended and I was pulled into a restless sleep.

...

**Clare**

I sat down on the sandy shore and buried my face in my hands. The beach was empty that day, since it was still misting and cold. I pulled a hoodie out of my tote and put it on. I was freezing, and I felt so empty. I didn't bring any money with me, and I only had a couple items of clothing. My thoughts kept drifting to Eli, and I kept hoping that he'd come and find me. But he didn't get out of the hospital for 3 more days, and until then he wouldn't even notice I was gone. Well, unless my dad filed a missing persons report, which I doubted he would. The anxiety kept creeping up on me, and I wanted to escape. I wanted to keep running, to get as far away from Toronto as possible, but I had absolutely no energy. I hadn't eaten or dranken anything all day except coffee at the hospital that morning, and my stomach growled loudly at that thought. I fell over onto the sand, and the misty rain now hit my face. It was beginning to get dark, which didn't help the fact that not only was I lonely, I was terrified. My mouth was bone dry from thirst, and I knew I wouldn't last very long if I didn't get rehydrated. The only thing I could think of was to open my mouth and try to wet my mouth with some of the mist. It obviously didn't help all that much, and I began to panic.

...

**Adam**

I got off my shift around 5:00, and I had nothing else planned to do that day so I decided to head over to Clare's house and see if she wanted to tag along while I visited Eli again. I hadn't been to her house before, so it took me some time to find it. It was getting dark when I knocked on her door. The house was dark, and I doubted that anyone was even home. I sighed and turned around, just as the door flew open.

"Who are you?" a tall blonde woman asked, sounding annoyed.

I turned around. This must have been the witch Clare said was her dad's girlfriend.

"Uh, I'm Clare's friend. Is she home?" I asked.

"No." she snorted, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Oh, well where is she?" I asked.

"I don't know. The brat left this afternoon in some sort of tantrum."

My eyes widened. Clare wasn't the tantrum-throwing kind of girl. Something wasn't right here.

"Is... is she alright?" I asked.

"I don't know! She left with a big bag, she must be staying over at a friend's or something." she said.

From what I knew, Clare didn't really have any other friends other then me and Eli. Something _definately_ was not right here.

"Oh, well thank you. Goodnight." I said, not really meaning it.

She slammed the door. No wonder Clare hated living here, this women was the biggest bitch ever.

I took out my phone and called Clare's number. No answer. I sighed and shut my phone. Maybe she was already at the hospital with Eli right now. But something was up, and I was a bit worried.

I got to the hospital 10 minutes later and headed to Eli's room. A nurse was just leaving as I was walking in.

"Excuse me young man, but visiting hours are over soon. Don't stay long." I rolled my eyes. The nurse left.

Eli was fast asleep. Clare was no where in site. This definately wasn't good. I left Eli a note on the bedside table saying I'd been there and that he should call me as soon as he woke up. Then I left the hospital, it was raining heavily now, and my thin hoodie didn't do too much to help. I sighed, debating whether I should head to the police station, go looking for her, or just drop the entire thing. I didn't actually have any proof that something that happened, but it did sound a lot like she ran away. I decided to go looking for her, because if it did turn out that everything was fine it would save me the embarrassment of having gotten the police involved for nothing. I checked the Dot, the pool hall downtown (though I doubt Clare would ever be there for any reason), the library, I even went to school and checked around outside the building. It was getting late, and I was soaked through my clothes. I was absolutely miserable and freezing cold, and for all I knew I could be searching for nothing. I decided to head home for the night, and that I would start looking again in the morning.

...

**Clare**

I couldn't sleep. That was the worst part. I would do anything to be able to escape this plummeting anxiety for at least a few hours. I was sore from laying still for so long, and I was absolutely soaked and freezing. I crawled over to a large drifted wood log about 1/4 mile down the beach, and used the last of my energy to dig a small ditch around it so I could halfway lie under it. It didn't do much to block the rain, but it was better then nothing.

It was at least midnight now, if not later. It was a starless night because the rain clouds blocked the sky. I was absolutely exhausted, thirsty and hungry. I begged God to take me away from this, I had never felt more miserable, terrified and lonely before in my life.

...

**Eli**

I woke up the next morning around 5:00, feeling absolutely drained. Even though the drugs kept me feeling tired, I still woke up a lot during the night and then falling back asleep. I sighed, and reached over for the glass of water the nurse always left on my bedside table when I saw the small, folded piece of paper. That was weird. I grabbed it and unfolded it.

_Adam was here around 6:30 P.M. Call me as soon as you read this, no matter what time it is._

I slowly sat up and swung my feet out of bed. My clothes and my phone and backpack were sitting on the counter across the room. I grabbed the long hanger thing the IV was on and leaned onto it as I slowly dragged myself across the room. What could Adam possibly need to talk about so badly? This better not be something dumb. I picked up my phone and called him. He answered on the fifth ring.

"Eli!" he exclaimed.

"Dude, why did you make me call-" he cut me off.

"Do you know where Clare is?" he asked.

"No..." I said "Why what happened?" I began to feel a little panicked.

"I don't know! I went over to her house last night and I was going to invite her to come to the hospital with me but she wasn't home and her dad's girlfriend was really weird about it. She made it sound like Clare ran away or something! I tried looking for her, but I don't know I think I might be wrong about this-" I cut him off.

"Dude, come over to the hospital right now! We're going to go look for her, you're right something does not sound right there. I just have to figure out how to break out of here, this place is like a goddamned prison!"

"Eli, you're in the hospital for a reason. I'll look for her myself some more and then I'll come back to the hospital and update you"

"No." I said, trying to sound as firm as possible. "Something is wrong. I don't care, I'm coming too."

He sighed. "Alright, I'll be there in 10."

He hung up and I slammed my phone down on the counter. Another thing that was keeping me tied down to this place like shackles was this goddamned IV. I knew there was only one way to do this. I would have to wait for Adam to get here though, so he could guard the door. I don't care though, Clare was in trouble and I had to help.

...


	17. Chapter 17

**Hey guys! I'm sorry for the lack of updates this week; school started for me this Wednesday and it's been quite hectic. Also, my dog died yesterday so that's been kinda hard. :( I'll try to get as many new chapters up as possible over this long weekend though! :)**

** Lots of love,**

** Stephanie**

** Clare**

Sometime after midnight, I had managed to fall asleep. I woke up, sore and stiff, just as the sun was rising. It was going to be a nice day, which was unfortunate because that meant the beach would be crowded today, unlike yesterday where it was completely empty. I used the last bits of my energy to sit up and pull myself out of the ditch and sit up on the log. My mouth was bone dry, and I was absolutely starving. I hadn't eaten in around 36 hours now. I felt sort of dizzy, I must have been a bit dehydrated. I put my head between my knees. I wanted to cry, but my eyes were just as dry as my mouth. I wondered if Eli or Adam had noticed I was gone. I wondered if my Dad ever filed a Missing Persons Report, but I doubt that. So this was what it was like to feel truly and utterly alone. I wondered if I'd die here.

...

**Eli**

Adam walked into the room and closed it behind him. There was obviously no lock on a hospital room door, so he put one of the green chairs that was against the wall by the bed under the door handle so it couldn't be opened from the outside.

"What's the plan?" he asked.

I started peeling the medical tape off the area where the IV was, Adam winced, sensing what I was going to.

"Okay, I really don't want to watch this." he turned around.

Pulling the needle out was not the most delightful experience, but I didn't care. All I could think about was Clare. I re-bandaged my arm and changed out of the hospital gown and into my clothes. My pants were okay, but my shirt was so torn up that I couldn't walk out of here wearing it without drawing attention to myself. The plan was that me and Adam would just walk out of here like we were visitors. I mean, it was a hospital, not a prison. Though it sure felt like one at times.

Of course when the hospital discovered I was gone, they'd call my parents. But I doubted my parents would even answer the phone.

Adam turned back around and I explained the plan to him.

"Okay, sounds good. Take my shirt though dude, you looked like you just got mauled by a bear." Adam said, walking over to the small bathroom that was connected to the room.

"Very funny." I said sarcastically. "Wait a minute, if I take your shirt what the hell are you gonna wear? You can't just walk out of here shirtless."

"I realize that. I have a hoodie, I'll just zip it up and no will know the difference." Adam said, walking into the bathroom.

He came back out and chucked the shirt at me. Gross, it was baby blue. I tore off my ruined shirt and put that on. Then we left the room. And of course, as my luck goes, as soon as we turned down the hallway that lead to the elevator the nurse that had been in and out of my room checking on me all of yesterday was walked towards us. I groaned. _Busted._

She looked at me kind of funny. Did she recognize me? I used my acting skills to give her my best what-you-lookin'-at face. She shrugged and continued on her way. Adam looked at me, confused.

"That was my nurse." I said. "I thought we were gonna be busted."

"Well, that was close then." he shrugged and we got in the elevator.

A few minutes later, we successfully left the hospital. We then sat down on a bench outside.

"Where did you look yesterday?" I asked.

"Let's see," he thought "The pool hall, The Dot, the library and school."

"Okay. Then we can still look at the park, and I don't know if she is friends with Sav's sister again or not, you know how girls can be. But we might as well find out where she lives and ask them if they know anything. And maybe we could check back at her dad's house again." I suggested.

"Okay, let's go." Adam got up and we left the hospital parking lot.

...

It was around 9:00 at night. It was too dark to continue seraching, plus I was exhausted. We had checked a bunch of places around town, and the Bhandari's didn't know anything about Clare and her dad didn't even answer the door when we rang the doorbell. I called Clare's cell a bunch of times, hoping that she had her phone. Things weren't looking good, and she was definately missing. I went back to Adam's house, since the Torres' offered to let me stay for a few weeks. I set the alarm on my phone to wake us up again at 5:00 tomorrow morning. I was absolutely determined to find Clare, and I would search everyday until she was found. Of course, there was the nagging paranoia that something bad happened. That she was kidnapped or worse. But Adam said we would contact the police if there was still no sign of her tomorrow.

...

**Clare**

The rest of the day dragged by slowly. I drifted in an out of consciousness under the log, and luckily this part of the beach wasn't used much and most of the people were way at the other end. The thirst and hunger were driving me insane, I don't know how much longer I could take it. I actually wanted to leave the beach, to go back to the hospital and be with Eli. To have him hold me and tell me everything was okay. But I was literally stuck here. I couldn't move from the energy drainage, so I was pretty positive I would die here soon enough. I remember from a First Aid class at a summer camp I attended when I was in my preteen years, that you could only go 3 days without water. It was already Day 2.

...

**Eli**

The next day, me and Adam decided to search at the edges of town. We drove Morty there, after retrieving him from my mom's house. We first searched a woodsy rural area, with only a few houses. That area took up most of the morning. Then Adam insisted we stop for lunch at a small cafe, since I hadn't eaten at all since I left the hospital. I picked at my food, too upset to eat. Then we headed down to First Beach, a large beach that I had never been to before but I've heard of. It was a nice day so it was pretty crowded. We started at the south end, searching through the crowds of people for anyone that resembled Clare. This place was basically out last hope, we really had no more ideas on where to look and after this we were going to go to the police. I blinked back tears. I heard that if a missing person isn't found in the first 24 hours, that's a really bad sign. Eventually we got to a more desserted part of the beach. That's when I really gave up hope. Adam didn't even want to search this part, but I insisted on it.

...

**Clare**

I woke up when the sun was rising. Day 3. My thoughts were jumbled, I was really dehydrated and I knew it was only a matter of time before my body started shutting down. I started saying things to myself, my own voice made me feel a little less lonely. I didn't even realize what I was saying. The hours passed like decades, and I prayed to God just to let me die already because the waiting was agonizing.

...

**Eli**

I heard my name. I turned around. It sounded just like Clare's voice. Was I hallucinating? I must have been, there was no one around this area. I sighed and Adam went over and sat down on a nearby log. I followed him and sat down next to him.

...

**Clare**

Someone was sitting on the log. I froze in fear. But I was concealed by the log and the ditch. I couldn't control the hallucinations though. They were so real, that I had trouble trying to sort out what was reality and what was in my mind. They were mostly about Eli. I would do anything to take back this stupid decision to go to the beach, to have just gone into the hospital to see Eli so he could have talked me out of running away. I didn't want to die, I wasn't suicidal. But it was too late for that now. I had another hallucination, this one was so real that I wanted to scream out in frustration. It was of Eli, finding me here.

...

**Eli**

Adam looked at me, his face going pale.

"What?" I asked.

"Do you... do you hear something?" he asked, turning around.

I walked over around the log. There was a crevice dug out in the sand. It was dark though so I couldn't see too well. Then I heard my name, clear as day. I froze. Adam jumped, and pushed the log away from the crevice. There was Clare, shaking, her eyes wide and glassy and her face pale and sunken.

"Clare!" I screamed, pulling her out of the crevice and onto the white sand.

...

**Cliffy! Sorry! :)**


	18. Chapter 18

**Short chapter! This story may be ending in 5 chapters or so, I have come up with a good ending!**

**Eli**

Clare's eyes rolled back in her head and she shut her eyes. I looked up at Adam, feeling myself go pale.

"Call... 911." I finally was able to choke out, shock and fear clutching my throat, making it hard to breathe or talk for that matter.

Adam stood, frozen. Then he suddenly snapped out of it, and pulled his phone out of his pocket. His phone beeped 3 times as he pressed the numbers.

I cradeled Clare's head in my lap. She was as pale as a ghost, which scared me. Her auburn hair was full of sand and driftwood. Her clothes were soaked, and she was shivering slightly. I pulled off my blazer and wrapped it around her.

She kept twitching. I didn't know what kind of condition she was in, or how long she had been out here. What had happened? Did someone hurt her? I whimpered audibly, as I felt my eyes stinging with tears. Seeing her like this hurt me.

Adam pulled off his hoodie and handed it to me. I wrapped that around her too. I pressed her against my chest, trying to warm her up. Adam sat down next to me. His face was pained as well.

Then her shivering stopped. Her eyelids slowly fluttered back open.

"C-Clare?" I whispered.

She looked at me blankly. I could tell she was barely holding on to her consciousness. She tried to sit up but I gently grabbed her wrists and pushed her back down. She whimpered, in pain, and that sound broke my heart. Then, she did something that still shocked me to this day. She reached up to her neck, clutching her throat. Me and Adam exchanged shocked looks. I grabbed her wrist to pull it away, confused as to what she was doing. She then shoved my hand away, with more strength then I would have thought she was capable of, considering her condition. She gripped the tiny cross pendant hanging from the silver chain on her neck, ripped it off and dropped it into the sand.

...

The next hour went by in a blur. A short while after she had broken her necklace, she fell back into unconsciousness and hadn't woken up since.

It took the paramedics a long time to get down to the area of the beach we were at. They then loaded her in the back of the ambulance. Me and Adam rode in the back of the ambulance. The paramedics hooked her up to an IV. They told us she was severly dehydrated and that if she would have been in that condition for just a few more hours, things might have started taking a turn for the worse. I gulped. I considered the worse, what if someone had kidnapped her, raped her or something and then dumped her there? How did all this happen? Just the thought of someone taking advantage of Clare made me enraged. I clenched my fists.

...

Adam and I sat in the hospital room, next to Clare's bed. Her condition was stable, and they said after they got her re-hydrated and such that she'd be okay. She hadn't woken up at all since we had found her at the beach, and they said it might take a few days until she regained consciousness. I wasn't leaving this room until then.

...

**Clare**

I was in a room. A plain room, with no furniture. When did I get here? There was no door in this room, no windows either. How did I get in here? The last thing I was in Eli's arm. That must have been a dream or something, a hallucination maybe. My own thoughts were torturing me. What I would give to be able to see him right now...

And where was God? Where was He when I needed help? It seems like all my life I've been correcting mistakes, trying to make things right but they just end of worse. I don't deserve this. I must have been dreaming. I was so frustrated in my dream I ripped my necklace. I had given up all hope, I was going to die anyways...

The room seemed to be getting smaller, closing in on me. I panicked, trying to find a trapdoor or something that would get me out. It's always been like this, there is never a way out of anything.

I was suddenly blinded by a bright light. I screamed.


	19. Chapter 19

** Last chapter. I'm really losing interest in this story so I had to end it. Thanks you to all the great Reviewers and I'm sorry it took me so long to update. Sorry if the ending is sorta bad. I couldn't come up with a good ending. :(**

** Eli**

I was somewhere between consciousness and unconsciousness when a loud, obnoxious beeping sound made me fully awake. I jumped out of the chair in Clare's hospital room, just as a couple of doctors and nurses filed in. Then I looked over at Clare, she was shaking violently. A seziure?

"What's going on?" I yelled, above the noise of the chaos.

"Get him out of here." one of the doctors barked rudely as he fidled with Clare's IV.

Another doctor filed in and grabbed my arm. I shook him off.

"What's going on?" I yelled again, this time louder.

"Get the boy out of here!" the same rude doctor yelled again.

"Son, you need to leave." said the doctor that tried to grab my arm.

Adam walked into the room with a donut. He looked from the doctors to me with a look of pure confusion.

Clare was still shaking violently. A doctor pinned her shoulders down.

I finally obeyed and left the room, pushing Adam out.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"I DON'T KNOW." I snapped. Adam flinched.

"Sorry." I muttered.

...

Some time later the doctors left and we were allowed back in the room. A nurse explained to us that Clare had an allergic reaction to some of the pain medicine she was on, resulting in the seziure. It wasn't all that serious, but she was going to be unconscious for awhile.

...

**Clare**

I opened my eyes but quickly shut them. The bright lights overhead stung my eyes. I slowly opened them again, taking in my surroundings. I was in a white room, in a bed. Eli sat in a chair up against the wall, his eyes shut.

I tried to sit up but that movement stung my back. Adam walked into the room and practically choked when he saw my eyes open.

"Clare!" he screeched running over to me.

"What happened?" I asked softly.

"We should be asking you that." Adam said, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"Huh?" I asked.

"Clare?" Eli asked, practically running over to my bed. Then my memory slowly started coming back.

"I didn't want it to go this far!" I said, tears stinging my eyes.

"What do you mean?" Adam and Eli asked at the same time.

"I just wanted to get away from my dad and his girlfriend. I didn't mean to almost kill myself." I said.

"You tried to kill yourself?" Eli asked.

"Yes, I ran away. That's how I ended up on the beach. Who found me?" I asked.

"We did." Adam said.

I sighed. "I don't want to go back to my Dad's house."

"You don't have to." a voice said, walking in the door.

I looked up. It was Eli's mom.

I looked from Eli, to Adam, to his mom. Confused.

"Uh, hi Mrs. Goldsworthy." I said.

"Hi Clare. How are you feeling?"

"Honestly? Like poo." I said, all three of them cracked a small smile.

"Well, anyways I discussed things with Eli. We would love to have you move in again."  
I sat up, even though it hurt. "Seriously?"  
Eli smiled. "Seriously."

And then he kissed me.

_THE END._

** Ugh, so terrible I'm sorry. I figured it was best to end it with a crappy chapter then not at all. I'm sorry :( Stupid writer's block. Please keep reading my other EClare stories! I will have another one coming out soon titled "Don't Walk Away." Stay tuned!**


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